Books on Happiness / the happiness revolution - 2 students

True wealth kisses the feet of those who no longer desperately misuse, hoard, or grasp the objects of the world.

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Swami Rama used a bottle of shampoo to teach me this principle. Karen and I had the habit of bringing home shampoo bottles from hotels with the goal of donating them to our local women’s shelter. Over time, my generosity spread further than the bounds of the local shelter as I started to maintain a small collection of shampoo in my suitcase. Instead of giving the bottles away, I started secretly hoarding a small

bounty for no known reason. At some level I was afraid that the next hotel would not supply enough cleanser for my balding head. What woke me up was Swamiji’s comment about how hoarding anything at the personal level maintains the myth of scarcity. He spoke of trusting that what you need will be there – this can become a selffulfilling prophecy. It creates an attraction to solutions and discourages worry

from entering your mind. His words had caught me red-handed, and with a blushed-face my behavior instantly changed. This tiny adjustment in my hotel etiquette drastically decreased my newly-discovered feelings of vulnerability and scarcity. Until Swamiji pointed this out to me, my behaviors were subconscious and unfounded. No longer feeling fearful of shortages on my journey through life has increased my sense of trust in the world and the trust that what I need will be provided. I have never been disappointed.

SUMMARY:

•The principle of abstaining from theft is attained naturally when one realizes that “the possessions of others - physical and non-physical - can neither fulfi ll nor threaten your happiness.”

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ACTION ITEMS:

•Examine your life for things which are not yours, but which you cling to or desire nonetheless. Acknowledge that they do not belong to you and let go of your attachment to them.

PRINCIPLE FOUR: MOVING THROUGH THE

WORLD WITH A UNIFIED MIND

A unified mind is the antithesis of a scattered and divided mind. When your mind becomes the employee of your conscience, then your mind no longer harbors fantasies of fear and attack. Grooming your mind to listen to your conscience is one of the main themes of this book. This achievement is possible for everyone, and once this union is established, wherever you travel in the world you will feel an inner sense of unity with all people and places. The experience has been described as walking with a constant awareness of a divine presence or highest virtue. To observe such an inward phenomena implies a continence or self-mastery of the sensory network that feeds your mind, as well as a personal philosophy of unconditional acceptance or love.

According to yoga science, the senses reach outward and contact their chosen object and then bring the image and experience of that object back into the mind. The experiences that are more exciting and stimulating create a much larger impact on your mind, thus shifting your mood in a major fashion. But their impact can be much longer lasting than a passing mood.

The reverberations of powerful stimuli become the foundation for the development of our subtle habits and interests. Thus, we see people who are driven by their taste for sweets, others who crave touch, and some who crave music and conversation. The sexual urge is the most powerful and, therefore, can become the most disruptive if not directed and channeled properly.

The more you become free from the intensity of sensory cravings, the greater your joy and clarity will become.

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Intense cravings drain a great deal of energy from both your mind and body. If you allow your mind and body to become weakened by these cravings, you may lose some of the strength you need to withstand the challenges of disease, old age, and death. The science and psychology of yoga o er us the insights to understand this phenomena and the methodology for self-transformation.

The most practical apparatus to change the quality of the mind is the transportation of data through the five senses and the buddhi as discussed in Chapter One. When unsupervised, the senses run out into the world and make contact with a multitude of objects. Immediately upon contact, the senses flood the mind with the impressions and power of their experience. If the senses continue to do this in a random fashion, the contents and interests of the mind may become unmanageable.

Thus, this fourth principle of learning how to move through the world in a unified manner requires that you learn how

to understand and control your senses as well as your sensual urges. For example, sometimes I have the craving for a cookie. However,

once I eat the cookie, I may immediately want another one. It is the nature of desire that fulfilling a craving often does not bring it to an end. This is also true for stronger desires. Therefore, learn to live in moderation and fully understand that fulfilling your desires will not end your desires altogether. This implies the ability to understand and direct your choices of desire and activity. The more you become free from the intensity of sensory cravings, the greater your joy and clarity will become. Refraining from the fulfillment of all desires is not the goal. The goal is to control the senses in order to achieve deeper levels

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of inner awareness. Without a comprehensive understanding, any prohibition of desire commonly leads to an imbalance in both food and sleep. Thus, all desires must be studied, understood and mastered.

Any observer of their own mind or humanity, at any scale, can readily see the impulsiveness of our behavior. When spontaneous impulses or everyday desires are fulfilled without merit, chaos can dominate our lives. When Patanjali wrote this fourth principle, he gave us a vision of how a happy mind moves through the day – unified, satisfied and inspired. He acknowledged the multitude of distractions and desires that would quickly make anyone forget their bond with humanity. This fourth principle of self-mastery teaches and models the manners of channeling and choosing our sensual urges with dignity and virtue.

When desires build to the point of preoccupation — whether they are real or imaginary – then that desire dominates your life. You must have the freedom of choice to direct your attention in an appropriate

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and timely manner before an unwanted buildup occurs. Mastery of any urge requires a very broad understanding of your personality and habits. Gaining mastery of your sensuality implies understanding and choice – it is not a path of suppression or denial. As you begin to explore the human within you, it may seem that your inwarddwelling happiness is weaker than the objects of desire embedded in your sensory impressions. Do not worry. This tendency to instantly embrace impulses can be monitored and transformed. Every chapter of this book will provide you with a di erent strategy to lessen the strength of unwanted impulses. Logic is no match for a powerful urge. You will learn how to align your diet, breathing patterns, exercise, etc. in a manner that supports your logic and goals.

Start with simple urges that you feel you can successfully transform, and then move forward to deeper issues as your confidence increases. In time, you will be able to guide your awareness to look within. Then you will see and experience that true joy is more powerful and more desirable than the urges of your past. With this system, you transform your tendencies gradually; there is no need to fight with them.

I heard a cocaine addict describe his life as one who sets his own hair on fire and then tries to beat out the flames with an iron skillet. The blind actions of sensuality can drag the kindest person into a cesspool of confusion and regret. This draining of your sanity and joy can ruin your health and your life. Likewise, control is also the means for regaining and rejuvenating the vitality of your body, breath and mind.

If your desire for the taste of a donut or the smell of a good cigar is mandatory in your life, then learning to control your senses can reduce these activities to simple options instead of carved-in-stone mandates. All of us can imagine the drain of constantly being battered by urges we wish we could control. The failure of every diet, weight loss program, and exercise regimen can be traced back to answering desires that are oppositional to our healthier goals.

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Mastering your desires will bring you great freedom and contentment every moment of the day. The ancient texts say that enthusiasm and courage come from feeling free to choose how you live your life. The key is in understanding your desires, deciding which to ignore and which to fulfill, with the overarching goal of attaining unshakable happiness. You will master your desires and find the freedom you seek when you do not suppress and do not indulge.

SUMMARY:

•Learning to control your senses and gently guiding them to engage in constructive and helpful activities will allow you to begin obtaining freedom from the intensity of sensory cravings. In their place, you will begin to experience your inward-dwelling joy.

ACTION ITEMS:

•In order to practice the concept of “do not suppress and do not indulge,” the next time you desire something which is not helpful for you, say to yourself: “That’s all right for my mind to desire that object, but I have control over my body and I will not go and get that object for my mind.”

PRINCIPLE FIVE: FREEDOM FROM

POSSESSIVENESS

The fifth principle of living with purpose is freedom from possessiveness. This freedom is multi-layered: you become free of the gross addictions and dependencies on material objects and, at a much deeper level, you become free of labeling yourself and others. We either proudly display or hide from every label, diagnosis, or title that we acquire in life. In order to attain this fifth principle, it is necessary to transcend all forms of gathering objects and labels -- external and internal.

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The principle of “non-possessiveness” has two aspects: a worldly part and a personal identity part. Everyone has an aunt or uncle who is a packrat, constantly gathering every small trinket from the world. The first aspect of non-possessiveness involves reducing your attachment to worldly goods that may hinder your journey to joy.

The second aspect is the way we “possess” our identity. Some people are very attached to their identity as a bodybuilder, a sports car owner, or a millionaire. This kind of possessiveness can also limit your happiness.

The secret to mastering the principle of non-possessiveness is to perfect the art of non-acceptance. This means that you no longer accept anything that delays or detours your journey. Non-possessive- ness means not letting the people and objects in your life possess you. In non-acceptance, it is perfectly fine to have worldly possessions as long as they do not hinder your happiness. It is wonderful to be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company as long as it brings joy and not misery. This is the art of non-acceptance.

Non-acceptance is a practical approach to living your life. When your happiness is reliant on the physical objects of the world, it is subject to decay and destruction. All objects can break or be taken; this is why happiness must be found within. Therefore, you can learn to recognize the objects that limit your ability to find inner happiness and choose better options. One such example is a plasma-screen television. For some of my patients, if I gave them a new plasma television, they would never accomplish any contemplation, meditation, reading, or self-study. Instead, they would spend their entire free time in front of the television. For these patients, a plasma television would definitely hinder their progress toward happiness. In the spirit of non-acceptance, sometimes you must reject material objects.

Non-acceptance also o ers some solutions for overcoming issues of identity and labeling. Any label or identity that does not

When your happiness is reliant on the physical objects of the world, it is subject to decay and destruction.

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enhance your self-respect or self-development should be ignored. In my first book, Happiness: The Real Medicine, I briefly discussed my childhood identity of being a

mistake-maker. A seemingly harmless joke and a teacher’s label changed my childhood for the worse. Years later, I now fully understand the power and damage labeling can cause. Do not label yourself and do not label others.

Frank, one of my dearest patients, came to me with terrible news. He had su ered a brain stem injury due to a fall at work and the doctor’s prognosis was not good. In fact, the doctors told him that he had an irreversible condition causing his brain to be imbalanced. Frank was devastated and frightened. Ever since his accident he had migraines, changing moods and strange food allergies that caused him to lose almost all of his body fat. At the brink of hopelessness, he came to my doorstep.

For almost two years he had been slowly deteriorating mentally and physically. His diet had become so restricted, due to his allergies, that he was only eating fish. When I began to discuss his prognosis with him, he was very grim and gloomy. I immediately realized exactly what had happened and his next year of o ce visits with me proved it to be true.

Frank had become a victim of his own diagnosis to the extent that he believed his physician despite the fact that his physician could not pinpoint his exact condition. Even after I treated him homeopathically and his allergies and migraines were cured, he still believed that his brain was not functioning and that he was doomed. His mind could simply not accept the fact that he was steadily improv-

Any label or identity that does not enhance your self-respect or selfdevelopment should be ignored.

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ing. Slowly, over the course of many months, his experience and our discussions fostered the idea of being completely healthy again.

There is an old joke in medicine that says, “What do you do when your doctor tells you that you have three weeks to live?” The answer is, “Get another doctor.” To search for other options and insights is not to disregard the first doctor. But in the search for happiness, the principle of non-acceptance teaches you to only accept that information which is helpful to your self-growth and self-esteem.

In Frank’s case, he needed to get another opinion and he needed to have someone tell him that healing was a possibility. Instead, he had completely changed his identity into being this fellow with an incurable disease. Years later, Frank slowly

shifted his identity and his behavior back to being a healthy individual. His healing continues today.

Once you have a firm understanding of the principle of non-acceptance, then non-possessiveness is easy and comes naturally. You will no longer accept anything that can threaten your happiness and wholeness. At this stage of understanding, you cannot be bribed by

charms or promises because you know what is helpful for your own self-development. Remember that non-possessiveness does not mean giving away all your worldly goods and living in poverty. It means not becoming overly infatuated with the objects of the world and your self identity. Everything in this world is here for you to use. But use it graciously as a guest — don’t clutch it desperately like a beggar.

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Comfort comes first as a guest, Then becomes your host, And eventually your master.

It is best to keep comfort as a guest. -Unknown

SUMMARY:

•Becoming dependent upon either physical objects in the world or any identity that you have constructed for yourself will not improve your ability to fi nd happiness, it will limit it.

ACTION ITEMS:

•Contemplate what you consider to be your identity and your possessions, and then contemplate what would be left if you had none of those objects or ideas.

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