I looked at Edward, and he was smiling; whatever was bugging Alice amused him.

Edward had more than enough camping gear to choose from — props in the human charade; the Cullens were good customers at the Newton’s store. He grabbed a down sleeping bag, a small tent, and several packets of dehydrated food — grinning when I made a face at them — and stuffed them all in a backpack.

Alice wandered into the garage while we were there, watching Edward’s preparations without a word. He ignored her.

When he was done packing, Edward handed me his phone. “Why don’t you call Jacob and tell him we’ll be ready for him in an hour or so. He knows where to meet us.”

Jacob wasn’t home, but Billy promised to call around until he could find an available werewolf to pass the news to.

“Don’t you worry about Charlie, Bella,” Billy said. “I’ve got my part of this under control.”

“Yeah, I know Charlie’ll be fine.” I didn’t feel so confident about his son’s safety, but I didn’t add that.

“I wish I could be with the rest of them tomorrow.” Billy chuckled regretfully. “Being an old man is a hardship, Bella.”

The urge to fight must be a defining characteristic of the Y chromosome. They were all the same.

“Have fun with Charlie.”

“Good luck, Bella,” he answered. “And . . . pass that along to the, er, Cullens for me.”

“I will,” I promised, surprised by the gesture.

As I gave the phone back to Edward, I saw that he and Alice were having some kind of silent discussion. She was staring at him, pleading in her eyes. He was frowning back, unhappy with whatever she wanted.

“Billy said to tell you ‘good luck.’”

“That was generous of him,” Edward said, breaking away from her.

“Bella, could I please speak to you alone?” Alice asked swiftly.

“You’re about to make my life harder than it needs to be, Alice,” Edward warned her through his teeth. “I’d really rather you didn’t.”

“This isn’t about you, Edward,” she shot back.

He laughed. Something about her response was funny to him.

“It’s not,” Alice insisted. “This is a female thing.”

He frowned.

“Let her talk to me,” I told him. I was curious.

“You asked for it,” he muttered. He laughed again — half angry, half amused — and strode out of the garage.

I turned to Alice, worried now, but she didn’t look at me. Her bad mood hadn’t passed yet.

She went to sit on the hood of her Porsche, her face dejected. I followed, and leaned against the bumper beside her.

“Bella?” Alice asked in a sad voice, shifting over and curling up against my side. Her voice sounded so miserable that I wrapped my arms around her shoulders in comfort.

“What’s wrong, Alice?”

“Don’t you love me?” she asked in that same sad tone.

“Of course I do. You know that.”

“Then why do I see you sneaking off to Vegas to get married without inviting me?”

“Oh,” I muttered, my cheeks turning pink. I could see that I had seriously hurt her feelings, and I hurried to defend myself. “You know how I hate to make a big deal out of things. It was Edward’s idea, anyway.”

“I don’t care whose idea it was. How could you do this to me? I expect that kind of thing from Edward, but not from you. I love you like you were my own sister.”

“To me, Alice, you are my sister.”

“Words!” she growled.

“Fine, you can come. There won’t be much to see.”

She was still grimacing.

“What?” I demanded.

“How much do you love me, Bella?”

“Why?”

She stared at me with pleading eyes, her long black eyebrows slanting up in the middle and pulling together, her lips trembling at the corners. It was a heart-breaking expression.

“Please, please, please,” she whispered. “Please, Bella, please — if you really love me . . . Please let me do your wedding.”

“Aw, Alice!” I groaned, pulling away and standing up. “No! Don’t do this to me.”

“If you really, truly love me, Bella.”

I folded my arms across my chest. “That is so unfair. And Edward kind of already used that one on me.”

“I’ll bet Edward would like it better if you did this traditionally, though he’d never tell you that. And Esme — think what it would mean to her!”

I groaned. “I’d rather face the newborns alone.”

“I’ll owe you for a decade.”

“You’d owe me for a century!”

Her eyes glowed. “Is that a yes?”

“No! I don’t want to do this!”

“You won’t have to do anything but walk a few yards and then repeat after the minister.”

“Ugh! Ugh, ugh!”

“Please?” She started bouncing in place. “Please, please, please, please, please?”

“I’ll never, never ever forgive you for this, Alice.”

“Yay!” she squealed, clapping her hands together.

“That’s not a yes!”

“But it will be,” she sang.

“Edward!” I yelled, stalking out of the garage. “I know you’re listening. Get over here.” Alice was right behind me, still clapping.

“Thanks so much, Alice,” Edward said acidly, coming from behind me. I turned to let him have it, but his expression was so worried and upset that I couldn’t speak my complaints. I threw my arms around him instead, hiding my face, just in case the angry moisture in my eyes made it look like I was crying.

“Vegas,” Edward promised in my ear.

“Not a chance,” Alice gloated. “Bella would never do that to me. You know, Edward, as a brother, you are sometimes a disappointment.”

“Don’t be mean,” I grumbled at her. “He’s trying to make me happy, unlike you.”

“I’m trying to make you happy, too, Bella. It’s just that I know better what will make you happy . . . in the long run. You’ll thank me for this. Maybe not for fifty years, but definitely someday.”

“I never thought I’d see the day where I’d be willing to take a bet against you, Alice, but it has arrived.”

She laughed her silvery laugh. “So, are you going to show me the ring?”