Modern Subcultures

Arms akimbo, defiant in their stance; a group with their own fashion, colloquialisms, music taste, and ideology.

Each group eventually becomes so popular that it collapses under the weight of their own anti-popular popularity, and assimilates into the very thing they opposed: The majority, the conventional, the ordinary. However, in their (often brief) existence, they thrive on being the social underdogs and each subsequent subculture seems to be both a protest and a tribute to the previous subcultures, resulting in an interesting mix of very different groups with somewhat similar ideals.

But, in the interest of keeping up a healthy level of competition a Top 10 site must have, we ask the following:

Which subculture was the best? In no particular order as we’ll leave you to decide the best, and thus absolve us of any perceived discrimination.

Punks

Remember when you and your crazy friends decided to pierce your ears at home with a safety pin and a potato, because you heard Sid Vicious did it? No? You weren’t born then eh? Ok, remember when Green Day came out with that Basket Case song and then suddenly all those dudes that were into Guns N Roses started listening to Rancid? Still too young eh?

OK, how ‘bout this? Remember when you stole that candy bar from the 7-11, were spotted by the dude behind the counter, and then ran out while the guy screamed at you, “Give that back you Punk!”?

Close enough. Probably ranked amongst the most aggressively anti-establishment of all subcultures, specifically on a political level, punks have always carried their beliefs on their sleeves and are never afraid to flaunt their dislike for anything rightwing. However, they are always fiercely loyal and actually generally accepting of all ethnic and cultural backgrounds. You make friends with a punk, he will be your friend for life, and he’ll make sure all the rest of the punks know that you’re on the “don’t bash his head in” list.

Hardcore Punks

For those that thought Mohawks and a general distaste for Queen Elizabeth weren’t enough (probably because you lived in Southern California and it was too hot for Mohawks and the Queen), you could shave your head, steal a guitar, and scream. Because, let’s face it, SoCal sucked back then and you just paid to see a little-known band called Black Flag punched your buddy in the face mid-song. These guys are not to be confused with Nazi skinhead gangs that give counterculture a bad name. Those guys should be set on fire by Henry Rollins… although, I’m sure he has plans to do so already.

Goths

The word that describes this subculture the best is probably “misunderstood”. I think everything I can say about Goths has been said better here: Fascinating read, if you’re into learning more about subcultures.

Oh, right, I can say one thing: I know that there is a drastic rise in skin cancer cases of late, but come on, everyone should have at least one summer holiday in Greece in their lives? No? Am I completely out of line here? You can tell me.

Hippies

Everyone knows one or knows someone that was one. Not much to say about this, you know who they are. And, well, they sorta suck (I know this is a best of, but seriously, fuck hippies man). You wanna talk evolution of subcultures? Start here. Look at what hippie-isms have given us!

1. New Age – astrology-loving, vegan-dabbling, dolphin-sound-listening, sandal-wearing, yoga enthusiasts that live in an age of spiritual enlightenment, but are really bankers by day.

2. Western Zen Guru assholes -  that think they’ve reached Nirvana because they visited the foothills of the Himalayas and have a ponytail… or worse, dreadlocks.

3. Eco terrorists - that want to save the whales, but drink bottled water. They claim to be vegetarians, but don’t mind eating fish. They want to save the environment, but still use shampoo… oh, and they ALSO have dreadlocks.

4. Trustafarians – rich kids that take a year off to go to Goa and claim to love reggae but only really listened to Bob Marley’s Legend album. And yes… dreadlocks. It’s cool on the Marleys, on Franti, on Rastafarians, but not on a blonde chick from the upper middle class suburbs of London.

5. Dead Heads – These guys are like hippies to the power of 10. Hippies10. Forget all the other things, man, they ONLY like The Grateful Dead. That’s it. Nothing else. Forget free love, forget changing the political landscape, forget freeing your mind… just keep on Truckin’.

I think I’ve been too cruel. The original hippies were actually pretty cool. They had spectacular music, an intellectual ideal for Utopia that was naïve but admirable, and hippie guys and gals are friggin’ hot