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Task 10

Read and translate the text

FITTING IN

(after Mike Quin)

Part I

Once there were two philosophers, who, having answered an advertisement in the newspaper, got themselves jobs as lighthouse keepers on a lonely island way out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. They were the only human beings on the island and there was only one little housed for them to live in. Having been put ashore with all of their belongings, they picked up their suitcases and started walking towards the house standing about half a mile from the shore.

Although they were both philosophers, they had entirely different views. While walking along one of them said:” This is a lonely place hardly ever visited by men, but with my philosophy shared by many people all over the world, I am sure that I will be able to fit myself into it. Give some time I can accommodate myself to anything. It is merely a matter of adjusting one’s mind to it”.

“It is lonely enough,” the other philosopher replied looking around, “but I am sure that we will be able to fix it up so that it is suitable to our needs. It is just a matter of a little hard work and perseverance.”

So saying, they entered the house built of local stone. Everything went well until they came to the bedroom. Having entered it they saw that the beds were little tiny thins scarcely large enough to hold a child.

“We’ll certainly have to change this!” exclaimed one. “Neither you nor I could sleep in those.”

“I can see you are of those radical complainers,” said the other shaking his head.”Why don’t you take things as you find them? That’s my philosophy. Fit yourself in. Why try to change the existing world? Take it as it is and make the best of it. That’s the philosophy now being advocated by many wise people.”

When asked what he thought about it, the other said: “Wouldn’t it be wiser to get busy with a little effort and make the beds larger? That’s what I am going to do with mine.”

“You are an unpractical dreamer,” said the other philosopher. “Why, just think of all the trouble. In the first place you would have to chop down a tree, saw it into boards and, having done that, you would have to hammer nails into them and heavens knows what all.”

That’s true enough,” said the other. “But what needs doing must be done. And if I don’t do it, I will never be able to get a good night’s rest. Both you and I do need it.”

“It’s all very well for you to speak about your Utopian ideas,” said the conservative philosopher. “But just try to put them into practice. Suppose the tree falls on you? Suppose you miss the nail with hammer and hit your thumb? You radicals never stop to consider these things.”

“Do as you please,” said the other. “But as for me, I’m going to change things to more comfortable shape.” So saying he got busy with an axe and started chopping down a tree.

1. Answer the following questions:

  1. Where did philosophers get jobs?

  2. Was there a cottage for them to live on the island?

  3. How did one of the philosophers assess the situation of living in the house?

  4. Did the other philosopher support his position or reject it?

  5. What kind of philosophy did the first philosopher propagate?

  6. Why did the second philosopher call him unpractical dreamer?

  7. How did he try to impose his philosophical ideas?

  8. What do you think whether his viewpoint was conservative or progressive? were his arguments persuading enough?

  9. Whose position would you take? Give you own arguments.

Part II

Skim the second part of the text for the main idea:

Having taken off his clothes the other man stepped into a tub filled with cold water.

Being attracted by the chattering of teeth, the industrious philosopher left his work and went to find out what was the matter with his companion.

Being asked what he was doing, the other philosopher replied:

“I’m shrinking myself. By nightfall I will be exactly the right size to it the bed.”

Having failed to shorten his length, and having caught a very bad cold instead, the conservative philosopher took out a pencil and paper and began writing an essay on the benefits of discomfort to justify his position.

About sundown, he approached his companion who by now was hammering the last nails into his finished bed. “I say,” he declared, “I have been thinking the matter over and have decided to chop off my legs. My feet hurt me anyway and that would make me just the right length”.

“Help yourself to the axe,” aid his companion.

Rolling up his pants he put one leg on the block, raised the axe, and then changes his mind. “If God meant me to suffer,” he said,” it is better that I suffer and not try to interfere with his will.”

Late that night the industrious philosopher was awakened by someone shaking his shoulder.”The thing I don’t like about you radicals,” said the conservative, “is that in the end all you are thinking of yourself. How can you sleep comfortably in that big bed while I, a fellow human being, am cramped beyond human endurance.”

“Climb in,” said the radical, “and stop complaining,” The conservative climbed in, and stretching out his legs, sighed in relief. Then, before he went to sleep, he said, ”If this is some trick you’ve got up your sleeve to put your propaganda over on me, you might as well forget it. I have a mind of my own. and I am not going to be dictated to. This bed will probably collapse before morning anyhow. So don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

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