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10 Tips for Preventing Divorce or Reconnecting with a Separated Spouse

After numerous years of collecting stories about the best and worst ways to handle marriage, separation, and divorce, the editors at Divorce Magazine have decided to offer some of their best tips about divorce prevention. These 10 suggestions might help you get to the point where you want to work things out with your current spouse, or they will help you in your next relationship. Either way, this advice is worth the read.

1. Make time to connect lovingly with your spouse every day. A couple can significantly improve their chances of marital success by devoting as little as 15 minutes a day exclusively to each other. For instance, you could wake up a little earlier, and spend the extra time in bed cuddling, making love, and reaffirming your love for each other. Take time every day to have meaningful conversations with each other; to listen with the same intensity as when you were dating; to touch, hug, and show affection; to tell each other how you feel about your marriage; and to talk about your goals for the marriage and your lives.

2. Compliment your spouse regularly ‒ both in private and in front of others. Even if your partner seems embarrassed or shrugs it off at first, the glow from sincere praise lasts a long time.

3. Love your spouse in the way he/she wants to be loved. We often make the mistake of assuming that the things that touch our hearts the most deeply will affect our partner in the same way. For instance, you may think red roses are the perfect gift, but to your spouse, they represent a waste of money and an allergy attack. If you don't already know, find out what your spouse yearns for, and then deliver it with love and no comments about how "stupid" it is to want a cordless drill/a picnic on the living room floor/a tuna casserole. Remember: the best gift is something your spouse wants not merely something you want him/her to have.

4. Take care of your appearance. Look your best for your spouse. Lose the ratty sweat pants or frayed sweater he/she hates so much; you can find other comfortable clothes that aren't a complete turn-off for your partner. This also means taking care of your health including eating properly and exercising regularly.

5. Remain faithful. Dr. Finnegan Alford-Cooper studied 576 couples who had been married for 50 years or more; in 1998, she released her findings in the book For Keeps: Marriages that Last a Lifetime. In her study, she found that 95 percent of the spouses agreed that fidelity was essential to a successful marriage, and 94 percent agreed or strongly agreed that marriage is a long-term commitment to one person. And these "lifers" weren't making the best of a bad lot: a whopping 90 percent of the couples she surveyed said that they were happily married after 50-plus years.

6. Do things together. Another common factor of long-term happy marriages is that the spouses regularly do things together that they find fun and exciting. Whether that's ballroom dancing, bowling, playing cards, SCUBA diving, or skiing, participate in at least one activity that you both enjoy every week. If you have kids, make sure at least half of these activities are for you and your spouse only.

7. Spend time apart. You take a pottery course while your spouse plays hockey; you play bridge and your partner collects stamps. You don't have to love everything your partner loves, but you do have to allow him/her the freedom to pursue cherished hobbies. An added bonus is that separate interests can generate interest between you.

8. Be friends with your partner. John Gottman a psychology professor who claims his research will predict with 91 percent accuracy whether a couple will stay together says the key to marital happiness and success is friendship. Some of the most important aspects of this type of friendship are knowing each other intimately, demonstrating affection and respect for each other on a daily basis, and genuinely enjoying each other's company. Gottman based his findings on 25 years of marital research, which he presented in his book The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.

9. The Terms of Endearment. Top Los Angeles divorce attorney Stacy D. Phillips says flowers, candy, cards, and gifts are all wonderful tokens of love, but if you really want your romance to last, you must practice some marriage-saving steps. She advises couples to spell out the basics of their relationship in a yearly contract or at least to clarify them. "Most disputes that break up marriages are over sex and money," she says. "Don't let surprises lead to trouble. Marriage is like any other contract: its terms and conditions must be reviewed and updated."

10. Say "I love you" every day. This is especially important when you're not feeling the sensation of love; at these times, you have to actively generate it. Saying those three little words, and performing loving gestures, will warm both your and your spouse's hearts.

12. Look through the list of top 10 countries with highest divorce rate in 2014. How can you account for the fact that in the first place is taken by the USA?

Top 10 Countries with Highest Divorce Rate in 2014

10. Canada: Canada is a developed nation, but with various social problems. The people here remain too busy in coping up with the challenges of tomorrow and don’t spend time with their families. This is one of the reasons of increased divorce rate in Canada, in addition to various other family issues. It is considered that the rate of divorce in Canada during this year has increased 50 % from 2013.

9. India: Although India is a country of rich cultural and religious values, but still it has an alarming divorce rate. The people of India are living miserable and backward lives. The lack of job opportunities and education among such people are the reasons of the divorce. The men fail to earn sufficient to support their families and thus leave their wives. The estimated rate of of divorce in India is 2100 cases annually.

8. South Korea: The divorce rate in South Korea, during this year, has tripled as compared to 2013. The common reasons of this issue in this country are lack of mutual understanding and no time to spend with the partners, which lead them get separated.

7. Russia: Russia, although, has become a developed and economically strong country, but the internal issues like crimes and divorce rates seem to be not ending in the near future. In Russia the rate of divorce, during 2014, has increased 65.4 % which is a serious matter indeed.

6. Ukraine: The male community of Ukraine is of dominating nature. For them their wives are the inferior personalities and this usually becomes the reason of increased divorce rate in Ukraine. This rate has increased almost 43.5 %.

5. Italy: Italians live hectic lives, all the men and women in Italy are professional and do different sorts of jobs. They fail to pay attention to each other and to the children and thus lack of affection becomes the reason of divorce. In Italy, the divorce rate has almost doubled than the previous two to three years.

4. South Africa: Whenever a boy and girl in South Africa get married, they are strongly adviced by the parents and relatives to live with each other. Sounds strange? Don’t get surprised because unfortunately the South African partners love to live apart due to professional reasons. This gives rise to lack of love and sexual relationships and finally they get no room of compromise. In South Africa, 61.2 % is the current rate of divorce which was about 34.5 % in previous few years.

3. Aruba: Divorce in Aruba is a common habit of the people belonging to villages. These live somewhat poor lives and lack of earning opportunities lead them get involved into divorce or murder like issues. The men kill their females because they don’t have anything for them to eat. This is, indeed, a very bad and shocking thing but still it’s the truth. In Aruba the males are dominating and don’t care much of their wives, this is yet another reason of divorce rate, which according to the current stat has 81 % increased.

2. United Kingdom: It is obvious for us to understand why the divorce rate in United Kingdom is so high, definitely the people here are open minded and don’t pay too much attention to their families. If on one hand, the married men have girlfriends then on the other hand the wives are not behind the race to spend time with their boyfriends rather than the husbands. In different cities of UK, the divorce rate has doubled (about 53 %) from what it was in 2013.

1. United States of America: USA is a nation of multicultured people. In order for the USA citizens to cope up with the challenges of advancements and development, they live really hectic lives with lots of workload, which means no time for the families. Thus, USA has the highest divorce rate in the world which has five times increased during this year as compared to 2013.