3. Face to face with life

One of the greatest blessings through mum’s illness was the chance given to me to get to know my parents as an adult. We had never had time for any deeper conversations. The three weeks ahead of us gave us a chance for that.

“Mum, how do you look at your life now in the face of your illness?” I posed a question and wasn’t quite sure if it was appropriate or well formulated. It came from my heart, mum understood and smiled.

“You see my child, life is not to be claimed. It’s a gift. When I was born no one gave any guarantee to my mother as to how long I would live. Many children never see the light of day. Some die in infancy, others in childhood. Some die as teenagers and never get a taste of mature life. Others leave young spouses and children behind. Yes, some make it to old age.

God has given me 58 years of life. I have lived with your dad for 39 years and all three of you have your families and I have seven wonderful granddaughters. It’s all a gift. I thank God for that. If in His mercy there are more days for me, they are only a bonus. I’ll be grateful for them.”

Mum’s answer assured me that she was looking at her situation realistically. From my early childhood I had learned from her about the simple faith of humbling myself before God. However, as for most people living in communist Yugoslavia, religion played a secondary role in her life.

“You are here for three weeks, and I have a special request. Tell me all you know about life after death.” Mum’s request wasn’t unusual. When 13, I started studying the Bible and committed my life to Christ. Four years in a religious school helped me to develop my spirituality and deeper interest for His Word. Branislav and I shared a passion for helping people to know God. Our further studies in England prepared us for that. At the time we were involved in pastoral work in Northern Ireland. Mum knew that I would be more than happy to share my knowledge of God with her answering questions she had never had time for before.

4. Drama in the graveyard

I opened my Bible and read a story in the Gospel of John 11:1-43, about Lazarus from Bethany, a friend of Jesus.

Jesus received the news of Lazarus’ illness but did not immediately hurry to go and see him. It was only two days after he died, that Jesus and his disciples were on their way to Bethany. Jesus met his sister Martha in mourning. She expressed her faith in the resurrection of the dead and in Jesus’ power to resurrect. She knew she would have to wait until the last day to see her brother Lazarus again.

Mum wanted me to reread the words that Jesus spoke to Martha: “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies, and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. ‘Do you believe that?” Quietly and solemnly mum responded, “I believe, Lord Jesus.”

Every detail of the story was important for mum. She tried to place herself in the situation. Martha called her sister Mary, who also believed in the divine power Jesus had. But it was too late; death had put the full stop on Lazarus’ life. When Jesus saw Mary weeping, He wept too. Mum commented, “He truly suffers with us.”

They made their way to the graveyard and Jesus ordered for the gravestone to be moved. Martha warned Jesus of the bad smell from the dead body that had been in the tomb for four days already. Jesus addressed His Heavenly Father and then in a loud voice called Lazarus. Lazarus walked out. Jesus ordered to free him from the burial cloths he was wrapped in. His friend Lazarus had been dead and now was alive. What a drama at the graveyard in Bethany.

Jesus’ godly power had control over death. What would a man do to be able to conquer death, obtain the key to eternal life or at least prolong it? The story was so impressive that it raised further questions. However, mum was getting tired so we had to leave it for the next day.