It did not sit right with Bill that a stranger was asking about his unborn child. “She’s… fine. We’re just going to wait on the operation.”

“I’ve read up on male pregnancy. They say if you can wait closer to nine months, you should.”

“Yes, thank you for the advice.”

The man beamed.

“See? I can be helpful! I wanted to see you before the surgery, but they wouldn’t let me on the maternity floor unless I showed proof that I was there for a patient, but they didn’t know about our connection.”

“Our… connection?” Bill looked at the man and tried to remain calm. He’d dealt with crazy fans before, but that was before, when he could still run or put up some sort of fight.

“Yeah! I was there at the Warsaw concert. You looked right at me when you sang ‘Wo Sind Eure Hande’. You looked right into my eyes.”

“Um… wow. Okay.” Bill didn’t know what to say to man, so he began to stand up so he could go back inside.

“Don’t go! I’m your biggest  fan, you owe me your time and attention,” the man hissed as he stepped forward.

“Okay,” Bill said quickly as he sat back down, and wondered how soon the man in the security booth could get to him if he yelled now. “What do you want from me?”

“I can be your best friend! I can take care of Zoe while you’re on the road. You can trust me, I took CPR at the community pool when I found out you were pregnant. It was meant to be. Can I touch your stomach? I need to get to know my goddaughter.”

“Please don’t touch me. If you know everything about me, then you know that I don’t like to be touched.” Bill covered his stomach protectively.

“But you have exceptions. People you care about. Just calm down, and let me-”

A large hand grabbed the man’s wrist and pulled him back. Tobi had the man pinned to a car, and was speaking rapidly into his walkie-talkie.

“Bill, are you okay?”

He had never been so happy to hear Saki’s grumbling voice before in his life. “Saki!” He reached out his arms for the man and the bodyguard acquiesced and enveloped him in a hug. “I was so scared… I thought if I screamed, he’d hurt Zoe,” he sniffed.

“It’s okay, Bill. I’m here.”

Bill watched, from around Saki’s considerable bulk, the man as he was taken away, screaming and practically frothing at the mouth for Bill. “Who was he?”

“A crazy fan. You have more of them than you think,” he said quietly. They both turned as Tom pulled up, tight lipped and face pale.

“Bill! Are you okay?” he asked as he jumped out of his SUV and ran around to where Bill was still in Saki’s arms. The vocalist released his bodyguard for his preferred method of comfort and sighed heavily in the crook of Tom’s neck as he rubbed his back soothingly. “What happened?” He turned his gaze to Saki.

“A mistake was made that won’t happen again. You are not to leave your brother by himself; especially when the paparazzi are about. They could’ve easily figured out you’d be here. I’m driving you both home, there is someone I want you to meet.”

Bill reluctantly released Tom so he could get into the back seat, but quickly reached for him again as soon as he was buckled inside. Tom slid in next to him and held Bill’s hands with his own. How could he have been so stupid as to think that he could’ve left Bill alone, in his condition, with the paparazzi swarming around the hospital? As he tried to fight his way to his car, he ran into more than a few fans, and as David as drilled into them to always keep a sharpie handy, he started signing autographs so people would let him leave quicker.

Something could’ve happened to Bill and Zoe.

“Don’t you dare blame yourself,” Bill whispered, and Tom looked down at his brother, who rested on his shoulder.

“What?”

“I know that look. Don’t blame yourself. We both made a mistake, and we’ve learned and won’t do it again.”

“That’s for sure,” Tom breathed as his grip tightened on his twin’s hands. “Why are you so mellow about this? I can’t stop jumping and imagining worst case scenarios…”

“I just feel really calm right now. You’re here, Saki’s here, and we’re away from the hospital. Yeah, things could’ve gone wrong, but it didn’t.” Bill nuzzled his nose into Tom’s neck and inhaled his scent. The smell was comforting, and it lulled Bill further. Wherever Tomi was, everything was okay.

And with that thought he drifted off to sleep.

 

“Bill, we’re home.”

Bill moaned and buried his head further in Tom’s shoulder. “No, not right now.”

“Bill, you get to lay in a real bed,” Tom said softly as he unbuckled his twin. Bill looked up at him blearily and yawned right in his face. “Oh, that’s real attractive,” he mused.

“Sorry.”

“Boys, before you go to bed, Bill; I have someone I want you to meet.”

“Noo…” Bill whined as the bodyguard helped him out of the car, but there was no real venom in it as he yawned.

Tom frowned at the car in their driveway. A brunette woman leaned against it, arms crossed over her chest as she looked around the warily. “That’s your friend, isn’t it? Our new housekeeper?”

“Yes, how did you know?”

“Same facial expression,” Bill chimed in as he grabbed his brother’s arm.

“Yes, well, always on duty. Come on.” Saki broke out into a smile and shook hands with the woman. “Melinda, glad to see you.”

“I got your call. Hello, I’m Melinda Carlisle, nice to meet you both.” She gave the twins a pleasant smile and shook their hands.

“Why don’t we go inside?” Bill yawned as Tom pulled out his keys.

“Great idea,” she said as she nodded.

“I was under the impression that you wouldn’t be starting until after Zoe’s born,” Bill said after they were all seated in the living room. He couldn’t help but feel a little proud that he had another use for this room.

“Actually, it’s best that I transition into the household before the baby is born; you’ll have quite a bit to do before she arrives, and I will make sure that you have proper nutrition and the house is nice and clean. Two major things off your mind.”

The four turned towards the hall, where the distant sound of clicking could be heard over the hard wood floor. From around the corner Puppy launched himself into the room at a scamper and fell head over feet to find himself upright, bewilderedly. He barked once and sniffed everyone’s shoes until he came to Melinda’s boots. He sniffed once and cocked his head before he jumped on her ankle and began to hump as if his life depended on it.

“He’s… enthusiastic,” she said as she pried him off of her leg. Bill reached out for him and Melinda pet Puppy once before she gave him over. “What’s his name?”

“Puppy,” Bill said proudly.

“Wow.”

“I know, it just seemed to fit,” Tom said sheepishly. Puppy barked happily, and licked at Bill’s neck with a soft whine.

“I see. He’s very puppy like.” Puppy barked again and Melinda chuckled. “Alright, like I said before that adorable interruption, it would be best if I came in and started before the baby arrived; that way I can ease some of the stress now and that is sure to come.”

“That sounds really good,” Tom admitted. “You’re not going to live here, are you?”

“No, I have an apartment in the city; if I’m needed I can be here in ten minutes.” She crossed her legs and picked a small piece of lint from her knee. “I have trained at the Cordon Bleu, and anything I don’t know how to make, I can follow or find a recipe. We can set up a schedule for when you want me on the premises, when to do errands, and the finer details of my job. Every client is different, and as such the needs will be different.”

“Sounds like you thought of everything,” Bill said with a small smile. Puppy barked his approval.

“I try. If you like I can start tomorrow. Saki has already given me a set of keys to the house.”

Tom shot a glare in Saki’s direction, but the bodyguard didn’t even spare a glance.

“Wow, ok. Tomorrow sounds good, I guess. We can go over everything then. Uh, I think I’m going to fall flat on my face, so I’m going to have to excuse myself.” Bill lifted his arm so Tom could help him out of the deep couch.

“Of course,” Melinda said as she, too, rose. “You’ve had quite a day.”

“Say goodbye, Puppy.” Puppy barked and licked Bill’s chin again. “Goodnight everybody.” Bill waved before he disappeared around the corner with their pet.

“Well, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” Tom held out his hand so he could shake Melinda’s, but Saki shook his head.

“We have something else we need to talk to you about; we didn’t want to worry Bill,” he rumbled.

Tom frowned and retracted his hand. “What’s the problem?”

“Your brother has received quite a few death threats from what we believe is an extremist Christian group. It’s come in through the fan mail and is always the same; an unmarked envelope, no postage, no writing, nothing.”

“What makes you think its this group then?”

“Because they’ve mentioned your brother by name on their website. How he and his child is an abomination, and one member was quoted as bragging about the letters and threats they’ve sent to the label. Melinda shrugged. “I’m not called in for just anyone or just any circumstances. I am a black belt in Tae Kwon Do, Dai Jutsu Do and Wu Shu Kwan. I am certified in defensive driving and am licensed to carry a concealed weapon.”

Tom looked her up and down. “Are you carrying one now?” he asked skeptically, noting her fitted clothing.

“Two.” Melinda smirked.

The dreadlocked teen looked at Saki. “Are you that impressive?” he asked jokingly.

“Yes.”

Tom waited for him to continue, but the stoic bodyguard didn’t. “Right… well, if there have been death threats, why haven’t we had a guard?”

“You have; we’ve been hidden.” Saki said.

“So are these people a serious threat?”

“We’re not taking any chances.”

“So, should I tell Bill?” Tom asked.

“If you do so, don’t tell him why Melinda was chosen, or give him any undue stress. We’re handling the situation as discreetly as possible.”

“Okay.” Tom nodded. “Anything else?”

“No. Melinda will be back tomorrow morning at eight; from there you can discuss her schedule. If she shows up unexpected, know that there was a possible threat that needed warranted her attention. I don’t want you to give her any lip, Tom.” Saki looked at him pointedly.

“Hey, does she work for me or do I work for her?” He fired back.

“Goodnight, Tom.”

“Goodnight, Saki.”

~*~

“I didn’t think you were coming up,” Bill said sleepily as he idly scratched Puppy’s stomach.

“I just had a few questions for Melinda,” Tom lied easily as he stripped off his shirt.

“Like what?”

“If she could make ham omelets with extra cheese.”

“Mmm, that sounds good.” Bill yawned and shivered.

“Cold?”

“No. Are you coming to bed?”

“Yes. I’m just going to take a quick shower.” Tom leaned over and kissed his twin gently on the cheek. “Don’t wait up for me.”

“Don’t think I will be able to,” Bill admitted, and smiled as Puppy snuggled closer. “Puppy wants to sleep in the bed with us tonight.”

“I guess, just this once,” Tom murmured as he toed out of his socks. “I spoil you both.”

“Yes, you do.” Bill smiled as Tom kissed him again. “Are you still upset about today?”

“Aren’t you?”

“No, I’m just really sleepy right now. I don’t have the energy to be upset.”

Tom looked down at his twin as he drifted off to sleep and sighed.

Sleep did not come easily that night.

~*~

“So you decided to wait for the operation?”

Bill smiled his wide, open, fake grin and nodded. “I wanted to do what’s best for my baby.”

“That’s good. We haven’t seen much of you since the Oprah interview. “What’s the deal? Hiding away?”

“I’m here, aren’t I? Can’t call that hiding.”

“So, what was with the abrupt disappearance?” The man turned the subject back to his previous question.

“I had a health scare, that’s all,” Bill said easily.

The interviewer, Chris, smiled and raised an eyebrow. “We’ve found out it was more than just a health scare, and we’ve got pictures!”

Bill paled and turned to find a larger than life picture of himself, asleep, in the hospital in Chicago. “How did you get that?”

“A journalist never reveals their sources,” Chris said with a knowing wink. “What do you say to people who allege this is all just a publicity stunt?”

Bill took a deep breath and tried to remain calm. “Whoever took that picture did so without my permission. I was in the fucking hospital, why would you buy something like that?”

“You’re avoiding the quest-”

“I am fucking sick and tired of people telling me that every little choice I make regarding my baby is a fucking publicity stunt. I don’t care what you think, whatever is best for my baby, that’s what I’ll do. And if you want to be an asshole,” Bill sobbed, “then you go ahead and do that, but I’m not standing,” Bill whimpered as he struggled to get out of the deep chair, “sitting here and listening!” He blew the bangs off of his forehead and kicked his feet. “And someone help me out of this fucking chair!” he screamed.

~*~

“And you said all that?” Stephen asked, incredulously.

“I sure did,” Bill moaned, with his head in his hands. “I think I gave David a stroke.”

The therapist tried not to laugh, but it escaped anyway.

“It’s not funny!” Bill wailed. “It’s all over Youtube!”

“Well, I’m sorry.”

“No you’re not, you’re laughing.”

“No, I’m not,” Stephen reassured him as he cleared his throat. “So, what else happened?”

“Tomi laughed.”

“I’m sure.”

~~

“Because it was fucking funny!” Tom howled. “He said stuff I’ve only wished I could say. Besides, the stupid interviewer was being rude! Who is rude to a pregnant person?” he asked. “Fucker got what he deserved.”

“Fucker… got… what… he… deserved…” Stephen looked up from his pad and grinned. “Bill said your manager had a heart attack?”

“Practically. He sagged against the wall and complained about lightheadedness.” Tom shrugged.

“Did you help him?”

“I made sure he didn’t hit his head when he fell,” he offered.

“Well, that’s good.”

~~

“David said the label was pissed. It’s ‘the type of publicity that our band and the label doesn’t need right now’, and that I have to learn to control myself, hormones or no.”

“And what did you tell David?”

“That he can shove it up his ass.”

~~

“Another, absolutely awesome, moment.” Tom nodded.

“Does Bill feel that way about it?”

Tom fidgeted. “I guess.”

‘Why do you guess? Do you ever ask him?”

~~

“He has,” Bill admitted.

“And?”

“And…”

“And…?” Bill faltered lamely.

“And Tom has been eating Puppy’s food?”

Bill cracked a smile. “No, it’s just… I don’t know.”

“What have I told you about that?” Stephen asked firmly.

“That I do know, I just haven’t found the words for it.”

“There you go. You make me shed a tear whenever you remember something I’ve told you. Makes me think it’s not all in vain.” Stephen pretended to wipe his eyes and continued. “We don’t have to talk about it until you want to.”

“No, I think I want to,” Bill whispered.

~~

“I don’t know why Bill thinks he doesn’t have the right to be worried about the decision to carry Zoe to term.”

“That’s what’s bothering him?”

“I’d bet you a Comet, it is,” Tom said firmly.

“Why?”

~~

“It’s stupid.”

Stephen looked at him briefly.

“It makes me feel stupid when I think about it,” Bill corrected.

“So what is it, and I’ll tell you if it’s stupid,” Stephen joked.

“My fce is fah.”

“What?”

“My face is fat!” Bill snapped.

“Bill,” Stephen said patiently, “you’ve always been very slim. I’m sure the weight gain is more than a little jarring.”

“No, it’s not jarring; its horrifying! My face is fat, my ass is fat, and I’m tired of it.”

~~

“But I like it!” Tom exclaimed. “But I can’t tell him that, he’d bite my head off and dip it in peanut butter before he ate it.”

“Have you done anything to try and reassure him?”

“I have done everything up to, and including, kissing his ass.”

~~

“Tomi has been really good about my mood swings. I’m just being an ass.”

“But you knew the weight gain would have to continue in order for Zoe to be her healthiest.”

“Yeah, but seeing it is different.”

“True,” Stephen admitted. “Do you regret your decision?”

“Never.”

~~

“He would never. He’s so… determined now. He wants Zoe to be healthy, no matter how much he complains.”

“Good. He does know he can change his mind, right? The tests came back and he doesn’t have toxemia, so that means he can schedule the operation for whenever he wants.”

~~

“If you could see what I saw, you wouldn’t say that.” Bill shuddered.

“Fair enough; so how is Melinda working out?”

“Tom wants to make her part of the family after she made this amazing three sausage, three cheese, lasagna. It was just… amazing.”

“Sounds like you enjoyed it.”

“I had heartburn so bad,” Bill lamented. “But I had two helpings. Tom followed her around the kitchen when she brought out a homemade peach cheesecake.”

Stephen laughed.

~~

“I was not that bad.” Tom sulked.

~*~

“Fuck!”

Tom ran up the stairs two at a time and burst into their bedroom. Another despair filled wail came from the bathroom. Puppy scampered through his legs and towards the sounds of distress. “Move, Puppy,” Tom growled, and pushed the door open. Bill stood in front of the mirror, topless. “What’s wrong, Bill?” he asked quickly.

“Motherfucking stretch marks!”

Author's Chapter Notes:

probably.

“She made these?” “You couldn’t possibly think that I did…” “They just melt in your mouth!” “How can a sandwich melt in your mouth, Mommy?” “It’s a figure out speech, Rhiannon.” “How are they so small, and so perfect?” Bill asked in a daze as he stared at the platter before them on the table. “She has a steady hand. I think you could use the edges as rulers.” “Mommy, can I give Puppy one?” Puppy barked and wagged his tail eagerly as the little girl held her hand over the side of the table. Even the mere thought of food made the little dog extremely excited. “No, sit correctly in your chair,” Molly said exasperatedly. “Why can’t you just eat your food?” she asked as Puppy barked. He was being ignored, and did not like it. Bill handed him a small sandwich and smiled at he practically inhaled it. “I’m full,” Rhiannon complained. Bill looked at her plate. She had eaten the tea sandwiches and drank two cups of lemonade, but didn’t touch the marinated kale green salad, which turned out to be surprisingly good considering how green it was. “Really? Do you want anymore mini Panini?” “Yes! Two!” Rhiannon held up two fingers proudly as Bill hid his laugh by drinking some lemonade. “Then you’re not full. Finish your salad; lord knows you don’t get enough green vegetables when your father cooks.” “But I want a baby sandwich!” Rhiannon kicked her feet; this was the first time Bill had seen the tyke behave this way, and it was morbidly fascinating to watch. “Only babies get more baby sandwiches.” Lately Rhiannon had taken to repeating the phrase ‘I’m not a baby’. “So you’re a baby?” Rhiannon asked pointedly. Molly paused with another Panini halfway to her mouth and frowned. “Oh, I really want to hear the answer to this!” Bill crowed. The redhead thought a moment before replying. “I have a baby inside of me, which means I can have a baby sandwich.” “Oh.” “And if you talk back to me again, young lady, not only will you not have any cartoons for a few days, but it’s your father’s turn to pick the punishment. Are we clear?” “Yes,” Rhiannon replied, lowly. “Good; now eat your salad, its good for you.” Molly stared at her daughter as she picked up her fork and began to take the smallest bites imaginable of her salad. Bill was amazed. “She understood all of that?” he asked. “I’m five, not two,” Rhiannon snapped. Bill choked on his lemonade as Molly looked on ruefully. “She’s very smart.” “I hope Zoe is half as smart,” he said wistfully. “It’s not always the luck of the draw. Rhiannon has always asked a lot of questions, and I do my best to be patient and answer them, and if I don’t know the answer, we find it together. People forget that children ask questions not because they want to be annoying, but because they just don’t know.” “That makes sense, but Rhiannon speaks very well for a five year old. How did you manage that?” “Greg read to her before she was born. He would ambush me when I had gotten comfortable and wasn’t planning on going anywhere. We’d pick a book to read and while I fell asleep, he’d read to my stomach. She wouldn’t kick so much then, during story time. Her favorites were The Count of Monte Cristo and Shakespeare’s The Tempest. Still are, actually.” “Daddy does the voices. Mom doesn’t want to do them,” Rhiannon complained. “Makes me feel stupid.” Molly shrugged. “We also never used baby talk; we hate baby talk. “Mommy’s teaching me how to read!” Bill snorted at the bits of kale greens stuck in Rhiannon’s teeth. “Already?” he asked. “Isn’t it early?” “No. She sees books and tries to read; why not teach her? Besides, Greg’s mother wants her reading and writing before she goes to kindergarten. It’s doable.” “Wow.” “Greg did it, and Mother Williams has endless suggestions.” Molly shot Bill a look. “Done!” Rhiannon tried to lift her plate to show everyone. “Good. Wipe your mouth.” “Okay,” she said after she scrubbed at her face with napkin. “Can I go watch cartoons?” “Ask Mister Bill.” “Mister Bill, can I watch cartoons in the living room?” “Do you plan on putting your shoes on my couch?” Bill raised an eyebrow. “Noooo…” Rhiannon drawled. “And I know; if I want to play with Puppy, I have to be on the floor.” “Okay, you can go.” Puppy barked as Rhiannon slid out of her chair and ran into the living room. “She is so exhausting sometimes.” Molly exhaled. “I want Zoe to find another place to sit beside my bladder,” Bill grumbled. “I just want Joel to stop moving when I’m trying to go to sleep. I wait until he’s still, and as soon as I get comfortable he wants to play soccer with my pancreas.” “Who moved more, Rhiannon or Joel?” “Joel, hands down. But I tell myself that it will be worth it when I can give Greg a son and Mother Williams her grandson.” Bill smiled and wondered how Tom will react when he holds Zoe for the first time. The thought warmed his heart, and he couldn’t help but laugh at the thought that there would probably be more tears from Tom, than him. “Has she been bugging you lately?” “Yeah. This is around the time that I had my last miscarriage. She keeps calling to check up on me, but it’s making me nervous. I want to forget about that, just focus on the fact that this pregnancy has been really good and that I still feel great. But she keeps nagging.” Molly rolled her eyes. “So it’s not just my mother.” “Not by a long shot.” Molly shrugged. “I try to take her good advice and use it in my own way. That way I don’t go crazy.” “Staying sane is a really hard job, right about now.” They finished their food in silence, both wrapped up in their own thoughts. “Can I ask you a question?” Molly broke the silence hesitantly. “Sure.” "If… If you miscarried, and god forbid, would you try again?” Bill swallowed some lemonade and shrugged. “Doctors aren’t even sure it could happen again.” He paused at the sudden drop he felt in his stomach. What would he do? “But you didn’t answer my question.” “I don’t really know.” Bill looked down at his stomach and wondered if he could do it all again, willingly. “I hope I never have to find out.” ~*~ Tom walked into the room and wrinkled his nose. “What’s that smell?” “What does it smell like?” The dreadlocked teen turned to the bathroom. The door was open and he caught a glimpse of black hair. “What are you doing?” Bill was at the vanity with five different jars of creams as he regarded his stomach. “I’m being proactive,” he murmured as he turned left and right. “Okay, I’ll ask again; what are you doing?” “You notice how I keep complaining about stretch marks?” “Not at all,” Tom said, deadpan. Bill looked at him briefly before he picked up a jar and sniffed it. “Are those supposed to be stretch mark creams?” “Yes.” “Bill…” “What? I’m not happy, and Stephen said I’m not allowed to complain about things I can change.” Bill stuck three fingers into the jar and pulled out a glop of smelly cream. “Stephen and you talk about stretch marks?” Tom scoffed. “Not all the time. He said good advice can be used in more than one instance.” Bill slathered the stuff onto his stomach and made a face. “This doesn’t really smell that good.” “It smells like medicine.” Tom reached around Bill and picked up another jar. “Good. Maybe it will work quickly.” “Bill, you know you still have a while to go; you’re going to get bigger anyway, so why bother with this stuff now?” Tom looked up from the jar in his hand to catch his twin’s glare. “What I mean is, “Tom said hastily, “that your stretch marks don’t matter.” “You can see them?” Bill wailed. “No, no!” Tom put the jar down and shook his head quickly. “So you think I’m being crazy?” “Um…” “You do, you do think I’m crazy, don’t you!” Tom looked at Bill, with just his bra on, with that smelly goop on his stomach that jutted out from his small frame, hands on hips and a scowl on his face. “I think you’re making this into a bigger deal than it has to be.” “So, suddenly my appearance doesn’t matter?” Tom didn’t know how he ended up here, in this place where nothing that he said made Bill happy, but he was ending up there more and more often. “Um, Melinda went home for the night, but she said she made those cookies you wanted,” he said, hoping to distract his twin from his ire. “Don’t fucking change the subject,” Bill snapped as he picked up another jar. “Now will you help me put some of this on my back?” “Why? You don’t have any stretch marks on your back.” “And I don’t want any either, that’s why I’m going to put some stuff on now.” “I’m not doing it. You’re perfect the way you are!” Tom argued. “You’re so full of it, Tom. Everything you say is an insurance policy to make sure you’re able to still fuck me!” Bill screamed. “Okay, Bill. You’re acting crazy now.” “Of course I am, because you think I’m crazy,” Bill muttered. “What do you want me to say? Just tell me what you want to hear, and I will say it, since whatever I think of on my own just ends up being wrong and we argue,” Tom snapped. “Just get out,” Bill sniffed. “Fine.” Tom huffed and went to leave, but Bill caught his arm. “You’re not supposed to leave!” his twin said, plaintively. Tom counted to ten before he took Bill’s hand and sighed. “I don’t know what you want me to do.” “I don’t either, I’m sorry. “ Bill held out his arms for a hug, and Tom hesitated. “What?” he snapped. “I don’t want to hug you with that crap on you. I don’t want to ruin my tee shirt.” “…Are you serious?” “It’s one of my favorite shirts!” Bill huffed and shoved at Tom until he could slam the door in his face. “Fuck you, Tom!” he yelled from behind the door. Tom exhaled noisily and fell onto the bed. No matter what he did, he just couldn’t win. ~*~ “Yeah?” ”Did you check your email?” “Gustav, what?” Tom asked as he sucked some sauce from his thumb. ”You’re going to love our manager.” “What the fuck did he do now?” Tom bit his sandwich practically in half and praised Saki for recommending Melinda to them for the fortieth time in a row. He took a deep breath before he started to chew. ”If I interrupted your meal, I’ll let you go.” Gustav’s frown could be heard over the phone. “You act like you haven’t seen me eat before.” ”Yeah, but audio and no video is giving me vertigo. Dude, anyway, check your email.” Tom hung up the phone and looked around for his laptop. “Melinda?” “You left it on the patio table,” she said as she came around the corner. “Is Bill going to eat dinner?” “I’m pretty sure he is. He didn’t eat lunch?” “He said he wasn’t hungry.” “Is that normal? I mean, he’s pregnant.” Melinda smiled. “Even pregnant people lose their appetite.” Tom mulled over the information with a frown. “I’d still make him something.” He shook his head. “If you have any anti crazy pills lying around, could you crush them up and put those in there too?” he asked as he walked out onto the patio, without waiting on an answer. It was hot outside, but beneath the large umbrella over the table it wasn’t too bad. The breeze stirred up the napkin beneath his plate, and he sat down in front of his laptop and hoped it still had juice as he turned it on. The machine booted up happily with enough power, and Tom took another bite of his lunch. After wiping his mouth, he pulled up his email and tried to brace himself. Junk from Andreas, porn links from Gustav, and a self help site from Georg, the fucker. He smiled until he reached the latest, from Jost. David usually told the boys everything they needed to know in person, or ran any decisions that needed to be made were discussed in a band meeting. When he sent an email it was only when the manager thought he would be cussed out by one or more of them. Tom opened the email and snorted. Apparently the band had been booked for an acoustic set at some fundraiser in Berlin, almost a year ago, before Bill got pregnant. Surely they didn’t expect Bill to still perform... Upon reading further that was exactly what the label expected, and it was David’s unfortunate job to tell Tom and Bill. Tom abandoned his sandwich and composed with a scathing email that would turn David’s stomach. He snorted and pressed send. Once that was finished he felt loads better, before he realized that David had sent a copy to Bill as well. Hoping his twin hadn’t changed his password; Tom signed into Bill’s email and checked his sent mail. ~*~ “You agreed?!” Tom screeched. Bill looked up from the movie and raised an eyebrow. “What?” “I read the email from David.” “…And?” “And you agreed to do the performance?” Tom shook his head and sat on his side of the bed. Bill was propped up with pillows at his back, against the headboard with a can of whipped cream at his side and a container of chicken nuggets resting on his stomach. He chose a nugget and squeezed some whipped cream onto it before he popped it into his mouth. “Yes. It’s just an acoustic set, and only for forty five minutes.” Bill chewed and looked exasperated. “How did you know that?” “I read your email.” Bill paused. “Why do you have my password? Do you spy on me?” Bill glared at Tom tiredly as he shifted uncomfortably. “Never mind that. Why did you agree?” “Tom, it was decided way before I got pregnant. We can’t back out of it now, we’ve already been paid for the performance.” “Then we can give the money back.” “You tell that to the label, David, and not to mention Gustav and Georg.” Bill shifted and huffed. “Besides, it’s an acoustic set and I’ll have a chair that I don’t have to move from. It’s not like I’ll be bouncing around the stage.” “That’s not the point. I don’t want them to think they can force you to do anything,” Tom said plaintively. “I mean, I don’t really mind right now. David says we’ve got to stay in the game and make sure that our personal lives don’t overtake our music,” Bill mimicked. “David can go fuck himself. I told him that in an email.” “Oh, that’s cute.” “I know.” Tom ducked his head and looked at his twin beneath the brim of his hat. “Are you okay? Melinda told me you didn’t eat lunch.” “Wasn’t hungry then.” “But you’re hungry now?” Bill shook his head and popped another nugget into his mouth. “No, not really. But Zoe has been moving and squirming and kicking all day, and eating is the only thing that calms her down. And I had a taste for chicken nuggets.” He shrugged. “And whipped cream.” “And whipped cream.” Bill nodded. “Right. Okay. I just wish we could’ve talked about it before you went ahead and said yes. We’ve gotta start making decisions together. Especially when it comes to you and Zoe,” Tom said seriously. “I’m going insane sitting around, Tomi,” Bill pleaded. “I just wanted to get out and sing. I miss singing.” “You sing me to me.” Tom pretended to pout. “Yeah, and I sing to Zoe too, but that’s not the same. I miss the crowds and I miss our fans,” Bill said wistfully. “I miss that energy.” “I do, too,” Tom admitted. “I’m going to go crazy with nothing to do.” “I understand.” “No, you don’t. Zoe is taking up all my energy and I can’t even move the way I’m used to.” Tom couldn’t refute that. Before he was pregnant, Bill would flit around like a humming bird, flailing around however he wanted. Now he had to move slowly a lot of the time to maintain his balance. “I know it’s frustrating.” “Do you?” “I hear you complain all the time,” Tom joked. “I’m sure that sounded funny in your head. Out loud? Not so much.” Bill rolled his eyes and moved the chicken off of his stomach so he could scoot off of the bed. “I have to go to the fucking bathroom again,” he huffed and waddled to the bathroom. When Bill came out, he was surprised to see the bed cleared and Tom still waiting for him. “Hey, he said quietly. “Look, I’m sorry I haven’t been what you needed lately. I just… It’s finally sinking in that all we can do is wait. I know my wait is nothing compared to yours, but I don’t want to be punished for a decision you made.” “…I guess that’s fair,” Bill conceded. “I’m sorry; I’m just so fucking uncomfortable. It seems like I’ll never be comfortable again.” He pouted. “And there’s nothing I can do about it.” “Come on, lay down. We’re going to take a nap.” Tom patted the bed next to him with a small smile. “Are you sleepy?” Bill asked. “Yes,” Tom lied, smoothly. “Okay.” Bill climbed into the bed and smiled happily as Tom spooned up behind him. Tom put his palm flat against his twin’s stomach and felt Zoe moving about. “We’re taking a nap, little one, you need to sleep, too,” he murmured as he rubbed gently. “She always listens to you,” Bill said in a yawn. “I don’t get it.” “She knows her dad.” Tom was proud as he felt the tension leave Bill’s body. "Tomi?” “Hm? “We want Zoe to be smart, right?” “Everything her parents aren’t,” Tom joked softly. “Molly said we need to read to Zoe now, then.” “Now?” “Well, not right now, but yes, before she’s born.” “Okay. We can read her Guitar World and Maxim, and all the other magazines we have lying around the house. Bill, we don’t have any books, do you realize that?” “What kind of people are we that we don’t read?” Bill groaned low in his throat. “Bill, calm down.” Tom rubbed his little brother’s stomach with firmer strokes, and Bill stopped moving and relaxed again. “Are you okay now?” “Yeah.” “Look, we’ll just go shopping. We’ll go to the bookstore in the mall, and that way I can pick up this new cap I saw in a catalogue. How’s that sound?” Tom lifted his head when he received no response. “Bill? Bill snored. ~*~ “What do you think Zoe would like?” “Bill, it’s not like I can ask her.” Tom watched as Bill tried to choose between two books. “Just pick one!” Bill threw both in the basket and continued down the aisle. “I didn’t know there would be so many books for babies.” He looked at Tom as he tried not to fidget in place. “Are you okay?” “I’m bored, and want my hat.” Tom scratched at the beanie on his head. Bill laughed. “I know I shouldn’t laugh, but you look like a two year old.” “Whatever. Pick your books and let’s go, let’s go.” “Hold your horses. I want to make sure to get a good variety.” Bill glanced up, and saw Melinda pass by the top of the aisle with a couple of books in her arm. “Why is she here?” he asked quietly. “I asked her if she wanted to come along; something wrong?” “Ever notice that she watches us?” Tom cleared his throat. “A little, why?” He really hoped that Bill wasn’t suspicious, but it probably wouldn’t take long for him to figure out why she always stuck close. Bill came closer and lowered his voice. “Do you think she suspects anything?” Tom blinked, and tried not to laugh. “No,” he said, willing away his grin. “We’ve been really good when she’s over.” “Yeah. You’re right. Let’s keep shopping.” “Bill…” he whined as he hefted the basket on his arm. “You’ve got eleven books. This will last until way after Zoe’s born.” “But-” “Bill, if we leave now, I’ll hunt down the biggest cookie I can find and buy it for you.” “Really? Can you make it a taco from the food court?” Bill asked hopefully. “You know the food court is pushing our luck; our disguises aren’t that good. Might not hold up to too much scrutiny.” “Please? I’ve wanted a taco as soon as I walked in; now I can’t take it anymore.” “Fine.” One taco turned into six, as Tom watched devour the food in amusement. “Oh, this is so excellent…” Bill breathed as he bounced his knee happily. “You good?” “Oh, yeah.” “Zoe good?” “Definitely!” Bill’s mood had done a complete one-eighty as he sucked down a massive strawberry shake. Tom was pretty sure if Bill were short enough, he would’ve swung his feet back and forth in glee. “Good.” Tom wanted to kiss Bill; he looked absolutely adorable as he gave a fluttery clap and finished off his last taco. “Tomi?” Bill asked, after he swallowed. “Yeah?” “Could you get me some chicken nuggets? Just a few?” “What’s a few?” “Twenty.” “Holy shit, are you still hungry?” “It was just a few tacos.” “Yeah, a few, silly me. After you eat, we’re going to go get my hat, and I don’t want you complaining about the music or how long I look around in there.” Tom looked at his twin pointedly as he rose from his chair. “Hey,” Bill said as he raised his hands innocently, “I can’t help that I have taste.” “Yeah, keep telling yourself that, Cuddles.” Tom snorted and went to get in line. He adjusted his collar and lamented the smaller clothes he had to wear to stay incognito. He hated standing in line more than anything; Tom felt exposed but he couldn’t return to the table empty handed. Bill would flay him alive and then make him go back and get the nuggets. It wasn’t worth it to lose his place in line. Bill hated the wig. He hadn’t been any type of blond in almost a decade. His scalp itched and he began to feel uncomfortable. He looked over at Tom and tried not to grumble. His twin was still third in line. What was taking so long? Were they counseling the chickens before they stuck them in the nugget machine? His stomach growled and Bill rubbed it gently. “Its okay, Daddy went to go get more food,” he whispered to his swollen stomach. Bill burped quietly and jumped as his phone rang. It was on vibrate, on the edge of the table, and before he could grab it, the device shook itself off the table and onto the floor. “Oh, for crying out loud,” Bill muttered as he watched his phone dance on the floor. “I suppose you want me to pick you up, don’t you?” he asked it. It vibrated in response. “Fucking asshole; I ought to let you stay down there, but someone might pick you up.” He scratched his head beneath the wig and slid out of his chair. Bill looked down at the floor and realized it was much further down than when he was sitting down. “Need help, ma’am?” Bill looked up and tried not to snap. “I’m not a woman, but yes, could you hand me my phone? I can’t bend over.” “It looked like you were pregnant from over there.” The man snorted. “Maybe you need to lose some weight, buddy. Then you could pick up your phone yourself.” “I’m not fat, asshole, I’m pregnant,” he grumbled, and decided to get his phone himself. Bill gritted his teeth, and tried to bend over, but only made it halfway before his body protested and the wig fell off. “What the fuck, you’re Bill Kaulitz!” Bill closed his eyes as the man blew his cover. “Yeah, thanks asshole.” He looked down at his phone. “Could you just give me my phone?” “Fuck, get it yourself. You’re one of those sick fucks who got himself pregnant. What, taking it up the ass against God’s word wasn’t good enough for you? You had to usurp woman’s place and have a fucking abomination? Ass babies, we’re calling them.” “Who’s we?” Bill snarled. “Other stupid, ignorant little shits such as yourself?” “I ought to put you, and that devil’s spawn inside of you, out of your misery. I’d be a hero.” Bill turned as he heard a scream, and various people were pointing at him. He couldn’t leave his phone, and against his better judgment, he screamed for his twin. “Tomi!” Tom jerked around at the sound of his voice, and was running before it registered. There was a man standing in front of his twin, and he shoved him to the ground as Bill grabbed their stuff. “My phone!” he said, and pointed at the device. Two teenaged girls saw where he pointed, and all three dashed towards the mobile. The guitarist got there first, and slapped their hands away as they grabbed onto his clothes and tried to rip the phone out of his hands. “Stupid little shit; you think you’re better than me? You’re not worth shit, you or your baby!” The man had gotten up from where Tom knocked the wind out of him, and stalked toward Bill. Bill’s heart hammered in his chest, but he was tired of being called names, and when the man came close enough, he punched him as hard as he could in the jaw. It stung his knuckles like hell, but he heard something click before the man howled and grabbed his jaw. “Get off of Bill!” Tom screamed as he struggled to get away from the fan girls that had began to accumulate. His heart was in his throat and he couldn’t see how he could get Bill out without either of them getting hurt. His beanie was gone, and there was a steady pull on his locks that was becoming very painful. He kept pushing at the girls, but he couldn’t hit them, they were just girls. Bill still had his fists up, and the man roared and rushed Bill again. Melinda stepped in the man’s path, and jabbed his solar plexus before she delivered an uppercut to his chin. The man hit the ground, knocked out cold, and she checked Bill over. “Are you alright?” “Yeah, help Tomi!” Bill pointed to where his brother was slowly sinking to his knees. There were two girls on his back, screaming in each ear as they pulled and yanked on his hair and clothes. Tom hit the ground and tried not to give up hope that Bill was still alright. Quite suddenly the load on his back began to lighten, until he saw the smooth hand of Melinda. She grabbed his collar and hauled him to his feet. Her taser gun was drawn, and she was very serious. “Back up or you’ll get more than a little shock. Are you okay, Tom?” Melinda asked as she kept an eye on the man, still unconscious on the floor, and the fans that were breathing heavily, eyes wild. “Yeah.” Tom didn’t care about himself; he just had to make sure that Bill and Zoe were alright. “Are you okay?” he asked as he put his hands on Bill’s stomach. “Yeah,” Bill replied, shakily. “We’re fine. He didn’t get a chance to touch me.” “Let’s go. I’ve already called for back up.” Melinda jerked her head toward the food court exit. “I’m never coming here again,” Tom muttered as he picked up their purchases and shielded Bill with his body. ~*~ “So, you’re not just a housekeeper, are you?” Bill asked quietly as Saki drove them all home. Melinda hesitated. “No, I’m not.” “And you knew that,” Bill said, as he turned to his twin. Tom nodded. “Yeah, I did. But I didn’t want you to worry.” “No, I just had to find out this way. If I had known, I would’ve called Melinda before it got bad! Or better yet, she would’ve been at the table!” Bill screeched. “Stop treating me like I’m made of glass!” “You are, Bill! I’m not going to stop, I’m sorry!” Tom snapped. “Look, I should’ve told you about Melinda, but I didn’t. I’m sorry, and next time I’ll try and do it differently. I just didn’t want you to be concerned.” “Oh no, why should I be concerned?” Bill rolled his eyes and stared out the window. “I just almost saw you get mauled by fifteen year old girls, while a grown ass man tried to pick a fight with me and Zoe.” Tom sat forward with his head in his hands and sighed heavily. “I think we’ll plan our outings better next time.” “Yes, we will.” Melinda nodded in agreement. Bill crossed his arms and tried not to roll his eyes. Tom looked over at him and grabbed his hand. “Are you okay?” “I fucking decked him, Tomi.” He couldn’t help but beam at his twin. “And it felt so good.” Tom nodded. “I’m glad.” “Yeah; so the next time you hide something as big as fucking death threats from me, I’ll do the same to you.” Melinda coughed to cover up her laugh as Tom released Bill’s hand and crossed his arms. “Got it?” “Yeah. I got it.” It never failed; Tom couldn’t win.

Chapter End Notes:

Oi. People. I am so sorry its been so long between updates; this story is massive in my head, and sometimes it doesn't want to come out as quickly as we'd all like. I want to thank you for your patience, those who are still reading, and to those who read and review, I appreciate it greatly.

Author's Chapter Notes:

Um, I want some jewelry! *raises hand* And... Bill does, too.

“Yes, I agree with Tom.” “How could you? He kept something really important from Bill.” “But all that information would’ve done is made Bill worry. Everyone knows his doctor says he can’t be under any undue stress and worry. Hell, our whole lives is all undue stress and worry. Why add to that?” Georg grumbled. “I still don’t like it when people keep things from me.” “If I had information that would only make you upset, then I would keep it to myself. I want you to be happy, end of story.” Gustav finished off the rest of his toast and picked up his pen. “Pass me the crossword.” Georg flipped through the newspaper until he found the section the blond wanted. “I’m sure Bill is pissed.” “Of course he is. He’s a control freak who barely relinquishes control to his twin, let alone anyone else. But he’ll get over it. I’m just glad they have some protection in the house. Have you been online lately?” “Ever since I came across that site with Bill morphed into some sort of demon, I’ve stayed away.” Georg made a face and began to finish his cereal as he looked at the pictures of Bill and Tom, and their adventures at the mall in Berlin. “Poor Tom, he said his head is so sore, from where fans were yanking on his locks really badly.” “I love our fans, I really do. They’re awesome. But there are just a few that are…” “Lose their goddamn minds?” “Sounds about right; instead of helping Bill, they’re trying to molest Tom, fucking idiots.” Gustav grumbled. They lapsed back into comfortable silence, until Georg chuckled indignantly. “Bill looks insane in this picture.” “Bill always looks insane.” “Not always.” Gustav looked up from the crossword and shrugged. “Lately he does.” Georg grinned and snorted. “I think that’s just the whole pregnancy thing. You know Bill gets stir crazy.” “Yeah.” It was silent once again in the kitchen, with the barely there sound of Gustav’s pen as it scratched the paper, or Georg’s crunching of his cereal. “I tried to call you last night.” The blond looked up at his friend and frowned. “Did you? I think I had my phone off.” “Oh. I called your house; I thought something like that, but they said you weren’t home. You were with your friend Sabina.” “Yeah, I was. We went to a movie and got some coffee.” Gustav looked back down at his puzzle and filled in an answer. “Why? What did you want?” “I have to have a reason to call, all of a sudden?” Georg’s tone was light, but strained. Gustav’s pen paused, and he looked back up. “No. I just thought that because you called, you would’ve wanted to say something, so you could just tell me now.” Georg shook his head and dropped his spoon in the bowl before him. “It wasn’t anything really, just wanted to talk. Who’s Sabina?” “An old friend from school; she moved in secondary school and I we lost touch. They moved back and her father called my mother. They used to be friends. When I found out, I jumped at the chance to see her.” Georg kept his face purposefully pleasant, and nodded where appropriate. “Sounds like you had fun.” “I did. More fun than I thought I’d have. You know when you lose touch with someone… they always change. But we had the same chemistry we did when in school. It was nice.” Gustav smiled to himself and went back to his crossword. “So, did you two date?” “Nah; but we probably would’ve if she hadn’t moved. We were both weird people.” “Oh, okay.” “Why?” Georg shook his head and waved the question away. “No reason; just curious.” There was a bitter taste in his mouth, and he didn’t want to talk anymore. Gustav looked at him for a moment more, and went back to his paper. ~*~ “PUSH!” Bill whimpered as the woman screamed, and bore down on her husband’s hand. “PUSH, PUSH, give me one more good PUSH!” The camera wobbled before it refocused over the doctor’s shoulder. “Oh god, do they really expect her to push that thing out of there?” Tom was practically biting his collar as he tried to hide from all the screaming onscreen. “PUSH!” “She’s fucking pushing as hard as she can!” The twins yelled in unison. Puppy barked between them, and Bill shushed him with a quick pet. “I’m so glad I’m not a chick,” Bill grimaced and shrank away as the baby’s head exited the birthing canal. “What the fuck is that shit all over it?” Tom gasped as blood and feces came, along with the baby. “It looks like an alien!” They, again, said in unison. Bill’s phone rang on the arm of the couch and Puppy barked at the offending device. “Quiet, Puppy,” Tom admonished as he reached around Bill to grab it. “It’s not for you.” “You never know,” Bill mused, turning back to the birthing DVD. “Tom Kaulitz, is it so hard to call your mother?” Tom winced and mouthed the word “mother” to Bill, who also blanched and looked away. “I know you two are talking about me. I’ve called Bill and left messages on his phone, but he’s not answering. Is everything okay?” “How did you and Gordon enjoy the trip?” Tom tried to begin damage control before his mother got started. “Are you serious?” Apparently it was too late. “What’s wrong now?” Bill murmured next to him. “What’s wrong? Tell your brother that I find it hard to believe he couldn’t call me and tell me what happened while we were gone.” Bill blanched and rolled his eyes. “He’s fine,” Tom said as he looked over at his twin. Bill scratched his stomach and yawned as he played with Puppy on the couch. “So ask him why he can’t answer the phone.” “Mom wants to know why you can’t answer your phone,” Tom passed along dispassionately. He hated to be the messenger, but between his mother and his brother, he always ended up doing so. “Because I don’t really feel like talking to anyone right now; it’s not a big deal.” Bill didn’t even try to hide the boredom in his voice as he stared at the image on the television. The baby’s head crowned and it stretched the poor woman’s vagina like plastic. Tom shuddered and looked away. “He said he’s been busy.” “Too busy to talk to his own mother about his health? I’m just worried, you know. Especially with the crap in the newspaper.” “Mom we told you, don’t believe everything you read in the newspaper.” “But the pictures, I can believe those, right?” “Mom-” “No, you listen to me. Bill isn’t allowed to do anything close to what I saw in those pictures, you got me? Or you and I are going to have some serious conversations. Do you hear me?” When Simone was like this, it was best just to agree, and be humble. “Yes, Mom.” “Good. Tell Bill I love him, and I love you, too, okay?” “Love you, too, Mom.” “And call your grandmother. She’s worried too.” “Yes, Mom.” “And stop sounding like I’m hounding you.” “Yes, Mom.” Tom breathed a sigh of relief as he closed the phone and looked up just in time to see the doctor take a scalpel and make a small incision at the base of the woman’s vagina. The baby slid out a little further and suddenly, as soon as the shoulders pushed free, it came out without another delay. “Did he just…” “Yeah…” Bill whimpered and looked down at Zoe. “You’re not going to do that to Daddy, are you?” “Bill, you don’t have a vagina,” Tom reminded him for the twelfth time since they’d begun watching the film. “I know, but still.” “Lunch is ready,” Melinda said from the doorway. “Ooh, they’re ready!” Bill beamed and struggled up, off of the couch. “What’s ready?” “The tacos!” Bill grunted and managed to get on his feet. “I’m so hungry!” “How do you know she made tacos?” Tom scratched his scalp as his twin looked at him with a withering glance. “Because I can smell them.” Tom sniffed as he dialed a number. “I can’t smell anything,” he murmured, and waved his twin off. “You better go unless you want to talk to Grandma.” “Tacos are calling. Besides, I just managed to get up off the couch; that should be rewarded.” Bill smiled and snapped his fingers. “Come on, Puppy; I’m sure Melinda made something for you too.” The little dog barked happily, and tumbled off the couch to chase after Bill. Tom smiled, and on the fourth ring the call was answered. “Hello?” “Hi, Grandma Lily.” “Tom! How are you doing?” “I’m good. How about you?” “I’m just fine. I went to a senior’s step class. I was doing better than the instructor half the time.” “That’s my Grandma,” Tom said fondly. “So, your mother calls me, all hysterical like.” “Yeah.” “You know what she told me; I’m just glad Bill didn’t fall, or was hurt. But how about you?” “Didn’t you hear? The manly man decided to go after Bill, the pregnant one. All the girls decided to jump me.” Tom scratched at his forehead and shifted on the couch. He didn’t like talking about it, even when Stephen tried to get him to open up, he found he couldn’t. Or didn’t want to. “You listen to me, Tom. Just because you couldn’t hurt those dumb little girls, doesn’t mean you’re unable to protect Bill, you hear me?” Grandma Lily’s voice was hard and to the point. “I know you’ll take care of your daughter and Bill as long as you’re able, okay?” Bill told Tom that their grandmother knew about their relationship, but Tom hadn’t had much of a chance to talk to Grandma Lily, let alone about that. He swallowed and nodded, forgetting he was on the phone. “It was hard, you know? I was on the ground and I couldn’t even do anything. I couldn’t move. What if he had hurt Bill?” “Melinda was there. Just in time.” “But what if she hadn’t been?” “Tom, why waste your energy worrying about what didn’t happen? Melinda was there. Now that Bill knows what’s going on, his fool behind better not go out without her. And if he does, he’ll have to answer to me. I don’t want him endangering your daughter and my great granddaughter; hell, she has my name!” Tom smiled, and wiped away the tears he hadn’t realized were falling. “Say it again, Grandma.” “Your daughter.” “Thank you.” Tom took a deep breath and smiled, nodding to himself. Maybe now he could move past this. ~*~ “Hey,” Georg said as Melinda let him in. “Hey, yourself; they’re on the patio.” “Maybe I came to see you,” he said with a smile. Melinda laughed and shook her head as Georg frowned and went to the patio. Bill and Tom were on one lounge, laughing about something as Tom rubbed Bill’s stomach. “Hey guys,” he said loudly, obviously interrupting something. Tom snatched his hands back and squinted up at Georg irritably. “Hobbit, what do you want?” “To talk to you, actually,” Georg said lowly. Bill frowned and looked back at Tom. “Okay.” Tom stepped over a slumbering Puppy and gestured back toward the house. “We’ll talk in there.” The guitarist led him to a room that they never used, but Bill nonetheless had furnished. It was an office of sorts, but the room still smelled new. Tom flopped down onto the couch, and Georg took a chair. “So, what’s wrong with Gustav?” “Why does something have to be wrong with Gustav?” Georg asked defensively. “Because you wouldn’t have that look on your face if it were a regular problem.” Georg cursed Tom’s flashes of awareness, and swallowed his retort. It wasn’t Tom’s fault. “I think… I think he likes someone else.” Tom shrugged. “So? I thought you guys had an open relationship.” “We did. Do. It’s just that I think he’s going to get serious with someone. We kind of agreed that if we wanted to get into a relationship with someone, we’d break it off with each other.” “You guys are such idiots.” Tom scoffed, and shook his head. “Anyway,” Georg gritted, “I think that time is coming and its here faster than I expected.” Tom shrugged. “You know Gustav doesn’t make a move until he has no choice. Are you sure you’re not rushing anything?” “It’s an old friend from school; Sabina.” “I’ve never heard of her.” “That’s the thing, neither have I.” “I’ll say again, Listing; maybe you’re jumping the gun.” Both guys turned at the sound of scrabbling over wood, and Puppy launched himself into the room enthusiastically. Georg smiled as he ran into his shoe, and he picked up the squirming puppy and placed him in his lap. The bassist gave a few long strokes to the dog’s back, and Puppy melted like butter, turning over and presenting his stomach for a scratch. “Maybe; but you know I follow my instincts.” Tom nodded. It was one of the things he respected about Georg. “Yeah, but sometimes instincts can be wrong. I’m just saying.” “Yeah.” Georg continued to scratch Puppy’s stomach and took a deep breath. “Maybe I am misreading things. “Maybe.” “But what if I’m not?” he asked quietly. Tom looked at the arm of the couch and picked with the fabric for a moment before he replied. “Well, you have two choices.” “Why do I get the feeling that I’m not going to like either of these?” “You can tell him how you feel, and see if he wants to continue with the relationship,” Tom began, ignoring Georg’s quip, “Or you can break it off with him.” “You’ll probably never let me live this down, but what would you do?” Georg asked hesitantly. Tom wrinkled his nose. “Gustav’s too stocky for my taste.” “Ha. Really.” “Well, I guess I’d tell him how I felt. Gustav makes decisions for himself, you know? If he decided to stay, then he’d stay and you could be sure it was because that’s something he wanted to do, you know?” “Yeah.” Georg nodded and rolled Puppy off of his lap playfully. “You’re right.” “I’m always right.” “Don’t believe him.” Tom and Georg looked to the door and saw Bill leaning against it, smiling tiredly. “You okay?” Tom stood up and walked over to his twin. Bill nodded shyly, and put his hand over Tom’s, where it rested on his stomach. “Do you want to go lie down?” “No, that’s the last thing I want to do.” Bill shrugged. “I don’t want to be in the house, but it’s hot outside.” “So let me take you two out to lunch. This new restaurant just opened, and the paparazzi don’t know about it yet.” “Fat chance.” Tom grumbled, and shook his head. “Why don’t we ask Melinda-” “Tom,” Bill said gently, “I don’t plan on hiding in here until the baby is born.” “Why not?” The whine crept into his voice before he could stop it, and Tom felt a bit sheepish. This side of his personality he tried to keep from Gustav and Georg. No need in everyone knowing how much of a pushover he was. “Because then they’d win, and you know I’m a sore loser.” Bill cupped his cheek and looked over his shoulder at Georg. “Melinda has to come.” “Fine by me,” Georg grinned, hands raised in mock surrender. “And no, you can’t sleep with her.” “As if she’d give him the time of day,” Tom jibed. “Ha ha, Kaulitz. Just get your ass ready. We’ll take my car.” ~*~ Bill looked up as someone knocked on his door. “Come in.” Melinda came in with a box in her hands, and placed it on the bed. “Package came.” “Awesome.” Bill clapped his hands and pulled it toward him. He loved getting packages. “What’s for lunch today?” “Tacos.” “Oh, thank god.” Bill felt Zoe flip at the mere mention of the foods. “I’ll send them up,” she said, amused, as she closed the door behind her. Bill clapped again and opened the box after he pulled off the nondescript brown paper wrapped around it. He squealed at what was inside. It was baby stuff; and not just any baby stuff, but very cool, very expensive newborn baby stuff. Bill lifted a pair of soft soled baby shoes, made to look like combat boots; they even laced up. Further down were assorted bibs with phrases like I stage dived in the womb and My scream will only get better with age, and his personal favorite, I was born to rock. There was even a onesie that had a leather jacket painted onto it. “There are twelve of them!” Bill squealed again, and stopped as his hand brushed something hard. He pulled out a rectangular box, and ran his fingers along the carved box, before he opened it quickly. He gasped, and almost dropped the box. Inside a platinum rattle and pacifier, and both are encrusted with what looked like crystals. They had to be crystals; they couldn’t be diamonds, could they? Bill lifted the rattle and stared at the shine coming off of the gems, and swallowed. They were diamonds. “Holy shit,” he breathed. Who the hell would spend so much money on his baby? He shook the rattle, and it sounded like chimes, instead of that horrible plastic on plastic banging sound you got with most rattles. He was in love. Bill shook it again and looked back down into the box. It was empty, save one thick linen envelope at the bottom. He put the rattle back in its place in the box, and closed it reverently before he picked up the letter. It was time to find out who sent it. Melinda looked up as the intercom buzzed. She wiped her hands as she walked over to the wall and pushed the button. “Anything I can do for you, Bill?” “Yeah, if you’re not busy, could you get me a lighter?” She frowned again, and hesitated. “You’re not… smoking are you?” “No, I’m not.” Bill sounded slightly exasperated. “I’m not stupid.” “You’re right, you’re not. Let me finish up here, and I should be up in about five minutes; how’s that?” Melinda heard rustling before Bill replied. “What time is Tom coming home?” “He didn’t say, but he’s in Hamburg right now. He called to find out when dinner was and said he’d be home before then, so sometime before seven thirty.” “Okay. Five minutes is fine. Let me know right away if you hear Tom come in.” “Sure…” Melinda shook her head. “Are you okay? Was the package okay?” “Oh, it was fine. More than fine.” “Okay. Five minutes.” “Five minutes.” ~*~ “You’ve been weird all night.” Bill looked up and watched Tom take off his shirt. “What do you mean?” he asked warily. “You’ve been so quiet. You were quiet during dinner, and even through dessert. Not even cream cheese mini cheesecakes could pull a conversation out of you.” Tom pulled out his wallet and put it on the nightstand. “Are you in pain?” “For the last time, Tomi; I’ll tell you if I’m in pain, I promise.” Bill rubbed his stomach and settled against the pillows better. “I just haven’t felt like talking today.” “You know how weird that is for me,” Tom joked as he stepped out of his pants. “But if you say you’re okay, then fine. I’ll leave you alone.” “Okay.” “Does it have anything to do with the package Melinda said you got?” Bill gritted his teeth. He’d wanted to tell Tom about that on his own time. “She told you about that?” he asked, deliberately keeping his tone light. “Yeah, just mentioned it really; so, what was in it?” Tom stretched and fell onto the bed next to Bill, on his stomach. He sighed in relief as his muscles began to relax, and Bill leaned over and ran his hand down his back, over and over. Bill might like to be petted, but so did Tom; and he rumbled low in his throat as he enjoyed the soft touch. He would never admit it was a purr, but his twin knew better. “Baby stuff, actually; really cool things. I already put them away in the nursery.” “So you were busy today.” “Ha. I didn’t get to go into the studio though,” Bill mock grumbled, and Tom chuckled. “No, you didn’t. That place is stressful enough without the pregnancy. They’re still complaining about track three.” “Maybe I can come in and just redo the vocals and everyone can move on. I would hate to think that one track was holding everything up.” “No, Bill. It can wait, no matter what David says.” Tom moved his head so he could look up at Bill easier. “What did David say?” “Don’t worry about it. Now what were you saying before you started talking about the studio?” Bill shrugged. “I don’t remember.” Tom shrugged, too. “Okay. I’m going to turn off the lamp, okay?” “Yeah.” Bill scooted down as Tom turned off the lamp, and shoved a pillow between his legs as he tried to get comfortable. “Oh!” He finally remembered, and Tom bit off his groan as he turned the light on again. “You remembered?” “Yes!” Bill grinned enthusiastically. “Um… something else was in the box.” “…Okay. What?” Bill reached into the nightstand drawer and pulled out the wooden box, and handed it to Tom without a word. He watched for his expression, but it didn’t change. “Holy shit,” he said lowly. “I know, that’s what I said!” Bill shifted closer and looked down at the black velvet interior. The two objects glittered almost obscenely, and Tom closed the box abruptly. “What’s wrong?” Bill asked, and reached out to take the box, but Tom put it on his nightstand. “We’re sending them back,” he said tersely. “What?” Bill screeched. “We can’t do that!” “Why not?” Tom crossed his arms and glared at his twin. “Because… because the box came with no name or address. It was just delivered.” Bill hated lying to his twin, but he really, really, really wanted to keep the rattle and pacifier. They were pretty and shiny, and he and Zoe could match jewelry when they went out in public. Who didn’t want that? “So you don’t know who sent them?” “No.” “…Bill, I’m not trying to be the bad guy here, but-” “So don’t, let me keep them. Zoe’s already gotten attached to them,” Bill said pleadingly. Tom looked at him like he was crazy. “That’s low, using our daughter to guilt me into keeping a really expensive gift from someone we don’t know. I don’t know Bill.” “Why not?” Bill abandoned his sweet voice and went to wheedling. “I want to keep it, and give it to her. It would be so awesome.” “Bill-” “Tom, I want to keep them!” “I’ll think about it.” Tom put reached over and turned off the light again. Bill sat up in the dark, looking at his twin incredulously. “You’ll think about it?” “Yes, Bill. I’ll think about it. You’re not Zoe’s only parent, okay? You promised you’d try and listen to me sometimes, and this time I said I’ll think about it? So go to sleep.” Bill’s jaw dropped and he stared in the darkness at where he knew Tom to be and slowly tried to process how the conversation went wrong. He eventually lay back down and frowned in the darkness. “And quit frowning.” Bill kicked his twin and turned over as best he could, and fell asleep, grumbling. ~*~ “He’s just a kid, himself; I don’t see how he could be an effective parent.” “But his parents are there to help, right?” “But they don’t live in Berlin.” “Thank you for weighing in. With the recent pictures and reports of Bill Kaulitz, now almost eight months pregnant, in fistfights and general reckless behavior, we have to wonder, what will happen to baby Zoe?” Bill gritted his teeth and watched as they played a montage of past behavior; his drinking, smoking, and eating junk food. At the end they put up a generic baby and gritted his teeth at the graphics superimposed over her. Zoe Kaulitz, a lost cause already? “Oh, fuck you,” he said aloud, turning the television off. Bill wanted to throw something, but the venue probably wouldn’t like that. Or worse, chalk it up to regular ‘rock star’ behavior. The green room okay; not the best they’d had, but definitely not the worst. He was lounging around, trying to relax until they could start the sound check. Bill looked up as the door opened, and tried not to frown as David walked in. “Bill, how are you doing?” “Fine.” “Good. Just checking.” Bill spared their manager a glance and raised an eyebrow. “Look, you don’t have to be nervous, okay?” “Then talk to your twin. He’s glaring at me every couple of seconds.” “Well, you know Tom.” Bill turned back to the television and pointedly turned it on. “Why aren’t you two talking?” “I think that falls under the heading of none of your business,” Bill snapped. David raised his hands in surrender. “Fine, I should’ve learned by now not to get between the two of you. We’ll be ready for you in about five minutes.” “Alright.” Bill didn’t turn around, but heard David leave in a huff. He was in a mood, and really didn’t care about anyone’s emotions at the moment. He was allowed to sulk, especially since Tom brushed off any talk of the rattle and pacifier for the past three days. Fine, then he wouldn’t say anything. His silent treatment was only twenty four hours in, and Tom ruined it with an impromptu make out session, but other than that, he was going full steam ahead with ignoring his twin. He lost himself in Spongebob Squarepants, and was surprised when the door opened again. This time it was Tom; apparently David wasn’t strong enough to face him a second time. The odd little victory perked him up a bit, but there was still the whole matter about him being mad at Tom. He turned back to the cartoons and turned them up. “Bill, are you still mad at me?” “Maybe.” Shit. He’d forgotten to not say anything. Again. “Bill…” Tom closed the door behind him and came to sit beside him on the couch. Without warning he began to kiss Bill’s neck, and it felt too good for Bill to tell him to stop. Seriously; he could never resist Tom’s kisses. “Don’t be mad at me anymore, okay?” “Can I keep the rattle?” Bill asked, breathlessly, as Tom’s hand slid down his chest and cupped his breast gently. He arched into the touch, and turned his head to claim his twin’s lips. Suddenly he pulled away and huffed. “You can’t change the subject with kisses.” “Why not? It’s worked so far…” Tom rolled his eyes at Bill’s glare and sighed. “You really want to keep it?” “Yes!” Bill scooted closer and kissed Tom deeply, until he could feel Tom’s arms circle around him and pull him closer. “So, you’re going to let me have it?” He already knew the answer to the question, but he wanted to make it seem like Tom was in control. “Yes, Bill. I guess.” Bill squealed and kissed Tom again. “Now, did you come to get me for sound check?” “Oh shit, yeah. They’re waiting for us.” Tom sighed and shook his head. “I want to take you home and do things to you.” Bill grinned and laughed. “Good.” It was thrilling to be on stage again. Everyone could feel it, even the crew. Bill sang his heart out and realized he truly missed his mic. Andreas was in a seat in the audience, cheering them on. He’d arrived halfway through, and even though it was one person, Bill felt like it was old times. Before he was no longer able to see his feet, and had embarrassing gas. “You know this is acoustic, Bill, right?” Gustav joked when they were finished. Bill only stuck his tongue out at the blond and semi bounced over to Tom. “We’re going to be amazing,” he breathed, and Tom had no choice but to agree. “I’m so excited,” he admitted, and handed a tech his guitar. “It’s going to be great.” “I know. Let’s go see Andi.” Bill did his fluttering clap and was helped down the narrow stairs to the floor. Andreas met him in the aisle, grinning. “You guys definitely didn’t lose it,” he said as he punched Tom on the shoulder. “Thanks, man. That means a lot.” Tom punched him back and Bill laughed. “It was so much fun; I’d forgotten how much I missed it. Your daughter loves Reden,” Bill murmured quietly to Tom as he rubbed his stomach. “She wouldn’t sit still.” “Maybe she was dancing. It must’ve been painful if she was dancing anything like you,” Andreas teased, and even Tom had to laugh before he tried to disguise it as a cough. “Whatever, assholes; you’re just jealous of the skills. Don’t hate the player, hate the game.” Both Tom and Andreas gagged; Tom recovered first and managed to get out, “Who’s been teaching you slang?” Bill tried to pout, but found he couldn’t. He was on cloud nine and had no immediate plans of coming down anytime soon. Dinner plans were made, everyone on the crew were going out to get something to eat. Bill managed to convince Tom that he was fine, and everyone, including Andreas, went to a nice restaurant to celebrate the upcoming show. Bill couldn’t remember the last time he’d smiled so hard, or laughed at so many jokes. He’d missed everyone in their crew, and their familiar faces felt like home. Old stories and old jokes were told, and a few new. The crew presented Bill with a baby present, a gift certificate to a spa for pregnant people. Bill was very thankful; he didn’t even know they had spas for just pregnant people, and vowed to go sometime soon. Earlier than he’d wanted, Bill’s eyes began to droop, and conversation began to die as everyone watched Bill try to fight sleep. Tom smiled at everyone and told him they were going to leave, and there were hugs and kisses on the cheek and Bill felt wrapped up in the love of their extended family. Even Zoe was relatively still on the drive home. Somehow Tom managed to get him upstairs and undressed, and the last thing Bill remembered that night was Tom’s soft smile as he drifted into a deep sleep. ~*~ The crowd is screaming, and Tom is beside him, jamming on his electric guitar. The show turned out not to be an acoustic set, but Bill wasn’t complaining. He bounced around the stage as best he could and felt a small twinge in his stomach during Wo Sind Eure Hande. He ignored it and continued on. Nothing happened afterward, so, when during Monsun, he felt it again; it took him by surprise. This time it wasn’t a mere twinge, but a stabbing pain. The music continued around him as Bill doubled over, and quite suddenly he found himself on his knees. The pain was getting worse, so bad he couldn’t scream. “Tomi,” Bill managed to choke out, before his voice collapsed into a hoarse scream. He heard a ripping sound, and turned over onto his back. His stomach was moving, even more than when Zoe would move. Suddenly there was blood everywhere and something clawed out from within him. Bill screamed as Zoe turned to look at him. But she wasn’t a human child. She looked like something out of a nightmare of a deranged mind. “What…what are you?” he asked weakly. “I am devil spawn,” she said, with the voice of many. “I have come to wreak havoc upon the world.” Bill screamed and opened his eyes. He was in bed, next to Tom, and had fallen asleep with the television on again. He turned off Rosemary’s Baby and shuddered. The room was pitch black, and Bill could still see the demonic smile on Zoe’s bloody face. He whimpered, and almost screamed as he felt hands on his hip and stomach. “Bill?” Tom’s sleep filled voice calmed his wildly beating heart, and he whimpered again as his twin pulled him closer. “Are you okay?” “No,” Bill sniffled and allowed Tom to pull him down until they were as close as possible. Tom kissed his face; gentle, feather light kisses that lulled Bill back to a sleepy state as he submitted to the equally gentle touches of Tom’s calloused hands as they rubbed his arm and stomach. Before he could tell Tom about the dream, Bill succumbed to slumber.

Chapter End Notes:

Thank you to my lovely beta for this chapter, Muse. Dudes, I finally had my brain together to actually write. I don't foresee my comp crashing again any time soon, so I shouldn't have such a difficulty updating soon. Thank you so much for your patience.

Author's Chapter Notes:

Probably not for Bill. *pets Bill*

“I can do that for you, if you’d like.” Bill shook his head and continued to scrub. “No, it’s okay; thanks though.” Melinda watched her employer scrub at the floor around the toilet and shook her head. Pregnant people were always so strange right before their due date. Apparently that extended to females and males. “Do you think you’ll want any lunch?” “Nothing much; just a ham sandwich and a pickle are fine. Or maybe two pickles. Skip the sandwich and just give me the pickles.” Bill paused for a moment and rested on his haunches. “A whole jar of pickles, the rest of the whipped cream, and some of that chicken you made last night. No, skip the whipped cream, and I’ll dip the pickles in gravy. Ooh, mashed potatoes. Mashed potatoes, pickles, and no chicken. Actually, if you could heat up that spaghetti that we brought home from that restaurant, and the garlic bread, that would be great. Oooh, garlic bread… No. Scratch the chicken; I want that kielbasa in the fridge cut up in the spaghetti. No, make it the mashed potatoes. Yes, sausage and mashed potatoes. Better yet, just make the garlic bread and put the sausage and the mashed potatoes on top. And don’t forget the gravy. And the pickles.” “So… no chicken?” “No chicken. I want a ham sandwich, too.” “Right… I’ll get right on it. Your brother will be home soon, should I prepare a meal for him before I go?” she asked as Bill picked something nonexistent from the scrubber in his hand, and began to get back to work. “Yes, please.” Bill had his tongue poked out as he attacked some poor invisible germ that existed only in Bill’s mind. She tried to understand that this was normal, but Melinda had cleaned the bathroom herself, just a few hours before. With a barely audible sigh, she went back downstairs to get the food ready. She passed Tom on the stairs, and he threw her a wave and a short salutation. “I’m home early, I know. You don’t have to cook, I’m taking Bill out. Thought it would do him good. I just have to change.” He watched Melinda cover her mouth with a snort, and run down the stairs. Tom didn’t really stop to think why their housekeeper was acting so strange as he jogged up to their bedroom. “Bill. Bill!” “In the bathroom.” “Well hurry up and get out, we’re going out for dinner.” Tom grinned as he heard the squeal from through the door. “What are you doing in there?” “Cleaning!” Tom frowned and went to the bathroom, and opened the door. He was presented with the sight of his twin’s ass, in the air, as he scrubbed at the tile. “What are you doing?” “Cleaning the grout.” The tile of the bathroom was fitted together; only seams, no spaces, and no grout. “Bill, do you know what grout is?” “It’s the little animated fungus on television, right? The one that has the party in that nasty dude’s dead toenail?” Bill blew his hair out of his face and looked back at Tom. “Right?” he asked again, testily. “Sure, why not.” Tom figured he was better off not fighting Bill when he was in this type of mood. All he wanted to do was change clothes and go get something to eat. He couldn’t do that if Bill was jumping down his throat. “We have a maid for that, you know.” “Melinda is not a maid,” Bill huffed. “She’s a housekeeper and after Zoe is born, she’ll be our nanny. So we’ll have to get a new maid.” He pulled the face mask off and wiped at his forehead with his elbows. “Where did you get those gloves?” Tom sighed and wondered when he would learn to not ask Bill any unnecessary questions. “I bought them that time we went to that store, in that place, remember?” “How could I forget,” Tom murmured dryly. “Yeah, well, I never wore them. So, since I didn’t want this gunk to get on me, I swiped one of Melinda’s masks and put the gloves on and got to work.” Bill beamed and pointed at the floor. “I can see myself in it,” he said proudly. Tom decided it wasn’t in his best interest to remind Bill that the tile was already reflective. “Great. So how long do you think it’ll be before you can get ready? I’m starving.” “Give me two minutes.” “I’ll make it ten since I know that’s what you really mean; I’m going to get dressed and we’ll leave.” Bill pushed his face mask back up and adjusted his elbow length black leather opera gloves before he went back to scrubbing. Tom watched him for about half a minute before he remembered he wasn’t supposed to be smirking at the way Bill’s ass wiggled as he pushed and pulled the scrubber across the floor. At least not until he could do something about it. He walked over to his closet and opened the door. Then he closed it, and opened it again. Tom closed the door and opened it again, hoping that it would change what he was seeing. Or, actually, what he wasn’t seeing. Tom counted to ten and walked calmly back to the bathroom. “Bill?” he asked pleasantly. “What?” “…Where are my clothes?” Bill paused and turned back to Tom. “The cleaner’s.” “The cleaner’s? Why?” “So they can be cleaned.” “The only clothes in my closet were clean.” “But I thought they smelled! You couldn’t smell them?” Tom pinched the bridge of his nose and tried to remember to breathe. “Bill, I thought we both agreed that you were imagining whatever you smelled.” “Yeah, but then when you left, I could still smell it. So I decided to clean the whole upstairs.” “By yourself?” “Yeah. I was the only one who was going to do it right.” Tom shook his head and went back to his empty closet. “What am I supposed to do for clothes?” he yelled. “I didn’t think about that!” Bill responded in kind. “You forgot that I had to wear clothes? When will they be ready?” “…In a week.” “What?” Tom groaned and stomped back over to the bathroom to hear his twin clearer. “What did you say? “In a week.” “Fuck, Bill! Are you serious? What am I supposed to do without clothes for a whole week?” “They kept me up all night!” Bill rolled backward and tried to stand up, but his legs wouldn’t take the weight in his position. “I couldn’t take the smell. They smelled like smoke, and booze and a bunch of other things I don’t even want to think about.” “You still haven’t answered my question!” “I didn’t want Zoe to inhale those smells. Her lungs are going to be really sensitive.” Bill fidgeted and held his hand up. “I need help,” he said quietly. Tom came over and helped Bill to his feet gently. “You ruined your gloves,” he said as he lifted Bill’s hands. “You should’ve asked Melinda for some.” Bill figured that Tom cooled down considerably because he still had his arms around Bill, not that he was complaining. “I’m sorry, Tomi. I really didn’t think of that.” “I guess I shouldn’t let you fall asleep to baby health shows.” “But all it takes is one little germ!” Bill looked positively terrified. “What if Zoe gets something because we’re lazy and nasty?” “Bill, we have a maid, alright? And while we’re messy, we’re not nasty, okay? I wash my hands more often than anyone I know, and you’re always wiping things down because you hate to get things on your hands. We’ll be fine, okay?” “Stephen said that as the due date came closer, I would feel more out of control, and maybe scared. I was prepared, but I didn’t know it would be like this. Anytime I’m not doing something that exhausts me, I’ll think of ways that the delivery can go wrong, or worse if… If…” He couldn’t bring himself to say it, and Tom pulled him closer to rest his chin on the top of his head. “Come on. We’re going out to dinner.” “But what about your clothes?” Bill sniffed. Tom shrugged and pulled away. “I guess I’ll go shopping for something to wear until the cleaners are done. At least I can buy some new caps,” he joked. “Oh god, like you need anymore of those.” Bill sniffed again and wiped his nose on a bit of toilet paper. “Okay. Let me squeeze into something and put some make up on. Then I’ll be ready to go.” Tom groaned. “That’s going to take forever, and I’m starving,” he muttered. “No it’s not,” Bill sputtered, indignant. “Ten minutes!” It took forty-seven. ~*~ Bill opened the door and grinned. “Rhiannon, did you enjoy your vacation?” The little girl beamed up at him and nodded; a face full of chocolate. “I got to see a bunch of pretty flowers!” She nodded. “So glad to hear it; Melinda is in the kitchen. Ask her to help you get some of that chocolate off,” he said as he wrinkled his nose. The five year old nodded quickly and bounded down the hall, the faint sound of Puppy barking as his favorite friend came near. Bill turned to see Molly shuffling up the walk, looking more uncomfortable than he’d ever seen her. He always thought she was a particularly graceful pregnant woman. Now, she looked like she had a tire stuck down the front of her shirt. “Don’t,” she warned semi-playfully. “I thought we were going to have a nice family vacation before the baby came, but all Greg did was stay in the hotel and work. I had to lug Rhiannon around Dublin while my parents kept telling me to take it easy. Don’t know how they thought I’d be able to do that when they gave Rhiannon everything she pointed at. Mother Williams is getting in the day before my due date so she can watch her while I get my body back.” Molly huffed as she stopped at the door, and leaned against the frame. “My feet hurt,” she said mournfully. “Join the club.” Bill rubbed her shoulder and moved out of the way so Molly could fit her unwieldy bulk through the door. “But at least it’s almost over.” “Shit, bathroom.” Molly grumbled and waddled her way toward the lavatory as Rhiannon bounced back into the room, with Puppy nipping playfully at her heels. “Mister Bill, can Puppy and I watch cartoons?” she asked as Puppy barked enthusiastically at her feet, tripping over the loose shoelace that trailed from a shoe. “Sure. You know where the remote is.” Bill watched Rhiannon again bounce toward the television and resisted a groan. Zoe kicked him right in the ribs; she’d been doing it all night, and now he felt constantly winded and more than a little sore. He had three weeks, and Bill was more than eager. Well, mostly eager. And a lot scared. Well… about fifty-fifty. Or thirty-seventy. “Looks like you’re contemplating the world’s mysteries.” Bill shook his head to clear the reverie and smiled as Molly returned with a far more pleasant expression on her face. “Nah. Just trying to figure out what we want for lunch.” “I am craving ham. However you want to serve it, I don’t care. I could chase down a pig right now and just gnaw on it,” Molly admitted. “I think I would pay good money to see you do that.” Bill snorted. “Let’s go pester Melinda. Even better, I smelled her baking something earlier. She’ll give us sugar if we’re good.” “Sugar,” Molly groaned happily. “I want sugar. So does Joel.” Bill rubbed his stomach as he followed his friend into the kitchen. Zoe wanted sugar, too. “Maybe after lunch, if you’re not busy, you can come run an errand with me. There’s something I need to do before Tom gets home.” “Sure. I’m free all day.” ~*~ “I don’t plan on being here all day,” Tom grumbled. “What’s the hold up?” “This track is still off.” David looked up and rolled his eyes. “I know what you’re going to say, you can’t hear it. But it’s there, and I don’t want this submitted until its perfect.” “So, what’s the problem?” Gustav asked, the only one in the room who was trying to keep the impatience from his voice. Georg had abandoned his easygoing attitude five hours in; Tom walked through the door in a surly mood. “It’s the vocals.” “Fuck.” Georg groaned and buried his head in his arms. He had high hopes of getting out of there soon, maybe even making it home in time for lunch with Gustav. Plans evaporated with that statement. “So we have to go get Bill to lay the vocals and then we’re done?” “Um, no.” Tom shook his head and quit scratching at the nape of his neck. Sometimes, when he felt antsy or irritable, the back of his neck would itch for no reason. Usually Bill would scratch it a few times, maybe even kiss it if Tom looked pathetic enough, and it would feel better. But Bill was all the way in Berlin, where Tom wanted him to stay. Fuck. “I don’t know what else to do. We’ve tweaked everything else.” David held up his hands and sat back in his chair. “Do you have any ideas?” he asked. Tom bristled. He knew that David knew that he had no ideas. David liked to ask questions that he already knew the answers to when he was tired and irritable. “Yeah,” he spat, “We should all go home and try this again tomorrow.” “Can’t; the label wants this track before the show. We need to get it done now. We can send Tobi and Bill can get here and get out in about four or five hours.” “Fuck that. No.” Tom shook his head and played with his lip ring as he stared at the wood table. “Do you have another idea?” Gustav looked over at his friend as he slowly rose to his feet. “Yeah. I’ll sing it.” Georg laughed before he caught himself, and David almost choked on his spit. “You’ll what?” “I said I’ll sing the vocals. It’s not like I don’t know the words.” “But can you sing?” David blinked as he tried to process what was being offered. “No offense Tom, but-” Tom cleared his throat loudly, and proceeded to sing the chorus of Monsun in Bill’s key. He looked up to see their manager looking at him as if he’d grown another head. “I made Bill swear not to tell anyone, and I can only hit the high notes once,” he said quietly. “Holy fuck. This might actually work.” David stared at him in a daze; while both Gustav and Georg’s mouths were wide open in shock. “If anyone tells anyone that I can do that, I’ll stomp my foot through your asses, and then I’ll deny it,” Tom fired at them. “Got it?” There were dazed nods from around the table and Tom smiled. “Good. Now let’s get this over with.” ~*~ “I’m coming in with you.” “Do you have to?” Bill looked over at Melinda as he unbuckled his seat belt. “Security, remember?” Melinda rolled her eyes and turned off the car. “Are you guys going to be okay out here?” She turned around to see both Molly and Rhiannon fast asleep on the back seat. “I think that’s a yes,” Melinda said dryly. “I can’t talk to you out of this?” “Nope, I just need to stop in really quick; nothing serious.” Bill swallowed and stared at the building. Bill eased himself out of the car and adjusted his sunglasses. He knew he didn’t want to be caught in a picture, walking up to this building, but the conversation he needed to have wouldn’t work on the phone. The building was very cool, and just what Bill’s roiling stomach wanted as his body temperature cooled a few degrees. There was the sound of music, and voices at the end of a hall, and he Bill walked toward the voices. He could recognize his from a mile away. He’d taken two steps when an exceedingly thick, muscled arm appeared in front of his chest. “Sorry, lady. You can’t just walk back there. You have to be on the list.” Bill looked over and up to a man that was taller than even him. He looked like a blond mountain, and the disposition to match. “Excuse me?” he asked lowly, glancing back down at the hairy arm in his way. “I said you can’t get through; all paternity complaints are handled through his lawyer.” The bodyguard leered openly at Bill’s body, but he didn’t take a step back. “I’m Bill Kaulitz, let me through.” “I don’t care if you’re the fucking Queen of Sheba, if you don’t back the fuck up and-” The bodyguard’s words faltered. Bill looked over to see Melinda pressing her taser gun into the back of the man’s neck. “You don’t have to touch him to talk to him,” she said quietly. “Do it again, and the whole building is going to wonder if I’m frying bacon, tubby.” “Look,” the man swallowed after stuttering the word out, “You can’t just barge in here.” “Watch me.” Bill passed the man and turned down the first hall he found. After he’d passed a few doors he began to hear strains of beats and cheering. Sure enough, as he turned the corner, Bushido’s crew was lounging around a recording studio as Bushido himself spat rhymes into the mike with bravado. Bill couldn’t help but roll his eyes. He continued past the door to the smaller window of the booth and knocked his knuckle against glass sharply. Bushido looked over and his smile widened as he signaled someone to cut the music. Bill backed away as the rapper came out of the booth with one of the most self satisfied smirks on his face. “Bill. Good to see you again. Aren’t you glowing?” he joked. “Funny. We need to talk.” Bill didn’t want to be there any longer than he had to, and being near Bushido always put him on edge. “Sure. Do you mean talk like your brother meant ‘talk’?” “You never turn off, do you?” Bill snapped. “No, not really… Come on, we can talk in my office.” Bill shrugged off Bushido’s hand at the small of his back as he was led further down the hall and around the corner to a large office. The décor was more sedate than Bill would’ve expected from the rapper, and gratefully eased down into a very plush chair as Bushido flopped down onto the leather monstrosity behind the desk. “You get my present?” he asked, before Bill could say anything. “Yeah, I did. I really liked everything in it.” “I hear a but coming.” “The fucking letter! Zoe should’ve been yours? I didn’t appreciate that so much.” Bill shook his head angrily. “I had to burn it so no one would find it.” “Because you want to keep that ice, don’t you?” Bushido smirked and shrugged. “Look. I’m already having a hard time with the paparazzi and their shit. Not to mention the tabloids. Could you not add fuel to the fire by opening your mouth and telling people how Zoe was conceived?” Bushido shrugged again. “Whatever makes you happy, princess. But I mean, no one takes me seriously, least of all me. Besides, we all know that Tom’s the father.” “What? Is it that obvious? Why is it so fucking obvious?” Bill wailed, struggling to stand up. Bushido’s grin dropped off of his face and he sputtered. “Wait, what? Are you fucking serious?” he asked slowly. “I was just… I mean…” The rapper sounded dazed as Bill finally managed to get to his feet. “You’re really fucking serious!” the older man said incredulously. “Holy shit…” “Shit!” Bill ran out of the office as quickly as he could, and looked around. He didn’t remember which way they’d come, there were two hallways and he couldn’t really see through the tears that suddenly were pouring out of his eyes and down his face. Something white was waved in front of his face and Bill took it eagerly, wiping at the mess that was now his make up. “Um, don’t cry.” Bushido’s face cleared up in front of him, and he looked more than vaguely uncomfortable. “I don’t want you to cry.” “But you know!” Bill wailed, and cursed himself for being unable to stop the tears. Bushido offered him the box of Kleenex and Bill proceeded to go through about six tissues before he could take a breath. “Fuck, everyone knows!” “Please, stop crying!” Bushido looked more freaked out by the fact that Bill was bawling his eyes out than the confirmation of Europe’s most speculated speculation. “Look. I won’t tell anyone okay? I’ll still shoot my mouth off and come onto you like nothing’s changed. I’ll just forget anything you said, alright? Just stop crying…” “Yeah, okay.” Bill sniffed and grabbed another handful of tissues before he stuffed the used ones in the box and shoved it at Bushido’s chest. “I gotta go.” “Yeah, okay.” “…And I’m keeping the rattle and pacifier.” “Whatever you want, it’s fine. It was a gift.” Bushido nodded hurriedly. “Good.” Bill sniffed again. “How do I get out?” After getting sent in the right direction, Bill turned the last corner to find Melinda sitting on the lap of the security guard that tried to stop him earlier. She looked over at him and winked, before turning back to the man and patting his cheek. “Be good, big boy. I’ve got go now.” “You’re really not going to give me your number?” the guard asked incredulously as she rose from his lap and waved over her shoulder. “Nope. See you around, maybe.” Melinda looked over at Bill, who was desperately trying not to smear his makeup while he wiped his eyes and searched his bag for his oversized sunglasses. “Are you okay?” “Yeah. Sort of. Let’s just get out of here.” Bill huffed tiredly as he finally found his shades and walked with Melinda silently to the car. Molly was awake, and looked slightly perturbed at Bill’s red face. “You alright?” she asked quietly. “Yes. Please don’t ask again,” Bill gritted. “Geez, point taken.” “Good. Now let’s go get some food. I’m starving.” Melinda started the car and shook her head, groaning internally. “So, where to?” she asked. And received five different answers from two people. She sighed and pulled off. Pregnant people were strange. ~*~ “So ready.” Tom admitted. “I’m past the point where I’m scared. Well, I’m still scared, but I’m more excited now than anything.” Stephen smiled. “That’s normal. I’m sure Bill’s driving you crazy.” “Oh, with the clothes thing? And the obsessive cleaning thing? Sort of, yes.” “Did your clothes come back?” ~~ “Yes, and they smelled better than ever.” Bill beamed. “So no harm, no foul.” Stephen grinned as his patient rolled his eyes. “Oh please. Tom likes to pretend a great injustice has been done to him. But that’s okay, the only thing that matters is his clothing isn’t keeping me up at night.” “I think it’s safe to say that it might not be the clothing that was keeping you up at night. Tom told me about the baby health shows you’ve been watching before you go to bed. He said one was called ‘Labor Emergencies’.” Bill shifted uncomfortably. “I just wanted to know what could happen, so I could be ready. So I don’t do anything accidentally that I shouldn’t have done.” “Bill, this is a trying time even if everything goes right. I think you should take the time to get as much rest as you can before the baby comes.” “I’ll do that after the show. It’s in a few days and we just have to get it out of the way and I can rest.” Bill hid a yawn and shook his head to clear the fatigue. “We had a run through earlier today. That’s why we were a little late.” “I cannot tell you enough that I think you should be resting. A show, even an acoustic one,” Stephen amended hurriedly, as Bill was about to object, “Can be stressful. We’ve gotten over the bout of high blood pressure. I can’t imagine how bad it is before a show, even before your pregnancy.” “I’ll be fine.” Bill nodded. “I’ll make sure to be calm and everything. I’m just so excited to get back to the stage. I’m hoping that the excitement outweighs the stress.” ~~ “I still worry.” Tom shrugged and played with his lip ring. “All I can do is tell Bill how I feel, and threaten David. If Bill even so much as has a painful fart, we’re cancelling the show. The label doesn’t like it, but the label can kiss my ass if they need to.” Stephen snorted. “I’m sure they could.” ~*~ Bill moaned and pulled Tom down for a kiss. It had been so long since he’d been in the mood to do anything, but Tom came out of the shower, wet and just… when he dropped the towel that was it. He just had to kiss him, and clothes were quickly abandoned on the way to the bed. Tom was gentle, so gentle, even when he slowly pushed into him. They rocked together; Bill was propped against a mound of pillows, with Tom between his legs. “Fuck,” he moaned as Tom grabbed his hips and lifted him into his thrusts. “Shit, I missed this,” Tom gritted out, running his hands along the satin skin of Bill’s stomach, and up toward his breasts. He closed his hands over them and thumbed the rock hard nipples before he leaned forward and sucked one into his mouth. “Tomi,” Bill groaned out, as his hands threaded through his twin’s locks. “Shit!” he swore, laughing a bit at the sharp pain on his nipple. “No teeth.” “Sorry.” Tom looked up sheepishly and began to thrust in earnest. The bed squeaked and that pleasant twinge settled between Bill’s legs as he arched into his brother’s touch as best he could. “Shit, Bill; I love you,” Tom ground out. Bill threw his head back and wailed as he came hard, his arms shaking as Tom yelled and stilled inside of him. When his body came down from its blissful high, he had an armful of Tom, careful not to rest on his stomach. He allowed himself to be turned to the side, and he snuggled up to Tom contentedly. “God, we needed that,” he whispered, kissing any skin he could reach. Tom rubbed Bill’s stomach gently and agreed lowly on the top of Bill’s head. All of the tension building in his limbs and head was suddenly gone, and his eyes drifted shut as Bill continued to murmur things even as he fell asleep. It was the perfect night, and Tom had no problem tumbling into slumber right behind his brother. Which was why he didn’t know why he was abruptly awoken. Tom cracked open an eye in the darkness and looked around. There was nothing, and just as he was drifting off again, he realized what woke him up. The phone beside the bed was ringing. It rang again and stopped. He was totally willing to believe it was a wrong number, because who would call them in the middle of the night? But then it rang again, and Bill didn’t even make a sound. Tom maneuvered around until he could reach the phone, and didn’t bother to hide his anger at being woken up so early. “Hello?” he growled. “Tom?” It was Molly, and she sounded out of breath. “Hi. I’m so sorry to wake you up in the middle of the night. Is Bill around?” “He’s asleep, what’s up?” Tom yawned and tried not to move around too much. Bill shifted in his sleep, and Tom reached down with his free hand and rubbed Bill’s stomach until he stopped moving restlessly. “I’m going into labor, and Greg’s mother isn’t here to watch Rhiannon. Can she stay with you guys for a few hours until we can get everything straightened out?” She began to breathe hard into the phone, and Tom could hear Rhiannon crying that she was sleepy and didn’t want to go out. “Please, you guys are my last hope.” “Yeah, sure. Okay. Um, I’ll get dressed and be downstairs.” “Thank you, Tom. You have no idea how much this means to me. I’m so sorry to spring this on you, but I wasn’t expecting Joel for another couple of days.” “Yeah, it’s okay. See you in a few minutes.” Tom looked at the phone and hung it up, groaning and setting the phone back on its base. “What is it?” Bill asked, in a yawn. “Molly is going into labor.” Tom yawned too, and flipped on the soft light next to the bed. “What?” Bill was definitely more awake now, and moved to sit up. “Is she okay?” “Yeah. She just needs someone to watch Rhiannon for a little bit until her mother-in-law comes into town.” Tom yawned again and went to the dresser for some sweatpants. “They’ll be over in a few minutes.” “Okay. I’ll go make sure the other guest bedroom is ready.” Bill moved off of the bed carefully, and pulled on some sweatpants and a tee shirt before shuffling out the door. Tom pulled his hair back and jogged down the stairs while pulling his tee shirt on, and reached the living room just as the doorbell rang. He quickly opened the door and smiled as Greg came in, carrying a sleepy Rhiannon, dressed in a purple gown. “Man, thank you so much. You have no idea how much we appreciate this,” he rumbled. He was taller than Bill and Tom, with a body more suited for a career as a linebacker than a corporate financier, and his chocolate complexion lent his daughter her perpetually tanned look. “No problem. Bill’s upstairs getting the extra room ready.” Tom smiled as Greg handed him a SpongeBob Squarepants bag and a fluffy white teddy bear. “Okay. Come on, baby girl. Wake up for Daddy.” Greg knelt on the floor and put Rhiannon’s sandaled feet on the ground. As soon as she had to stand on her own, she began to cry and try to get back into her father’s arms. “No, I don’t wanna. I want to go home,” she whined, and Greg chuckled. “Remember when I said that Mommy and Daddy had to go get your new baby brother from the hospital?” Rhiannon nodded. “Well, we have to go pick him up. We can’t have him waiting for us, can we? He’d be all alone, and scared. You don’t want that, do you?” Rhiannon shook her head. “Okay, Mister Tom is here, and he’s going to take you to bed, okay? Give me a kiss,” Greg said, and Rhiannon rubbed her eyes and stepped forward to give her father a kiss. “Okay, good. I’ll come by to see you as soon as I can, okay?” She nodded and looked up at Tom. “Hi, Mister Tom,” she whispered, and leaned against Tom’s leg tiredly. “Where’s Mister Bill?” Greg stood up and smiled. “She’s fine. As long as she’s not crying. Don’t give her too much sugar, or you’ll want to kill yourself. She’s allergic to pine nuts and apricots. Other than that, she should be easy to watch as long as you put some SpongeBob on.” “I wanna watch SpongeBob.” Rhiannon yawned and Tom grinned. The horn honked outside, and Greg blanched. “I don’t know why I’m standing here like I don’t have something to do. I’ll see you guys later, and thanks again, Tom.” Tom waved and knelt down to pick up an almost asleep Rhiannon from clutching his knee. She quickly curled around him, arms around his neck and head on his shoulder as Tom closed the door. He turned around and saw Bill standing on the stairs, looking at him with an unreadable expression on his face. “What?” he asked quietly. Rhiannon shifted and began to snore quietly. “Nothing; I just think that Zoe is going to be lucky to have such a good father as you.” Bill watched his twin come up the stairs, and he took the bag and stuffed animal from his hand and followed him down the hall to the second guest bedroom. Bill moved the blanket out of the way and Tom gently laid the little girl on the bed and covered her up again. She looked so small in the large bed, and they watched her sleep for a few minutes before Bill remembered the toy in his hand. He put it next to her and she quickly pulled it closer and didn’t move again. “I hope we’re ready,” Tom whispered, and took Bill’s hand. “For what, Zoe? I’m guessing we’ll find out.” “No, not for Zoe, for watching Rhiannon.” Tom looked at the sleeping child fondly. “I hear they’re always easier when they’re asleep.” “And Melinda’s off tomorrow, isn’t she?” Bill swore, and Tom swatted him on the ass. “Not in front of the kid.” But inside, Tom was swearing, too. Oh well, time to find out what he was made of. Besides, it was just a five year old girl. They could keep her occupied and well behaved. Hell, they were adults. Right?

Chapter End Notes:

Stay tuned, what everyone's been waiting for is happening next chapter. *le sigh*

Author's Chapter Notes:

Hell yes. Dedicated to Haylzeeeeeee, Darcy, Shannon, Muse, and everyone else who has stuck by me while this behemoth slowly moved to this point.

Bill opened his eyes and struggled to turn over. Standing in his doorway was Rhiannon, looking around with a confused expression on her face. “Mister Bill, why are you in my house?” she asked quietly. Bill looked over at the clock and groaned. It wasn’t even seven in the morning. What was she doing up? “I’m not in your house, you’re in mine. Your mom and dad had to go get your baby brother from the hospital.” He yawned and sat up, and instinctually looked over. Tom wasn’t there, but in his “room”; they’d both agreed that it would be easier to sleep apart one night than to have to explain to Rhiannon anything she might see. “Oh.” The five year old leaned against the door as she thought for a moment. “Do you usually wake up this early?” Bill prayed to whomever was listening that the answer was ‘no’, but sure enough, Rhiannon nodded enthusiastically. “Mommy makes breakfast for Daddy and me and we all say bye and he goes to work. Then I get to watch SpongeBob while she cleans up. She says she needs a break from me in the morning.” She came further into the room and tried to climb up onto the bed. Bill reached over and helped her up, and tried to come to terms that his morning was indeed starting at 6:40. “Are you going to make breakfast, Mister Bill?” Bill snorted and yawned. “Not if you want to live.” “What?” “I mean, I think we have some cereal. I hope so, at least. Do you like cereal?” Rhiannon nodded enthusiastically. “Yes!” “Good. Go wake up Mister Tom, and we’ll all have breakfast.” Rhiannon clamored off the bed, and ran out the door. Bill was asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow; which was why he hissed like a cat when someone shook his shoulder roughly. “Oh no, I’m not dealing with this alone. You’ve got to wake up too.” “Tomi,” Bill whined, pulling a pillow from his large pile and putting it over his head. “Do you know what time it is?” “Yeah. Almost seven in the morning. I’m awake, so you have to be awake too.” Tom pulled the pillow from off of his twin’s head and grimaced. “We have to keep her occupied.” Bill groaned and sat up irritably. “I want coffee.” “You can’t have coffee.” “Fuck.” “Not in front of the kid.” Bill blinked blearily and looked at the clock before groaning again. “Why did we say yes, again?” “Because Molly’s your friend, and needed help.” “Shouldn’t have answered the phone.” Bill yawned and shook his head, trying to clear the fatigue. “God, I don’t want to wake up.” “Same here, but come on. I told Rhiannon to get dressed, and we should do the same.” “I want to eat breakfast naked.” Bill pouted and began to move toward the edge of the bed. Tom snorted and went over to his closet. “As much as I would absolutely love for you to, we can’t do that to the poor girl. She’d be traumatized.” Tom yawned loudly and began to dig through his clothes for something to wear. He looked back over his shoulder to find Bill asleep, sitting up on the edge of the bed. “Bill!” he snapped. “Wake up!” “I’m awake,” he mumbled, and rose to his feet. “It’s just going to take me a moment.” “You can’t do that when Zoe gets here,” Tom reminded him irritably. “Because I’m not going to be the only person waking up in the middle of the night.” “Could you dial back the righteous indignation? You haven’t had to wake up in the middle of the night yet and I don’t have any plans of letting you do it all the time, okay?” “Fine, whatever.” “Whatever.” ~*~ Bill came downstairs to find Rhiannon and Puppy on the floor in the living room, wrestling. “Um, nice outfit, Rhiannon,” he said with barely a tremble. Apparently Greg had let her pack her own bag, because she was dressed as a princess. “Thank you, Mister Bill. My mom says if someone gives you a compliment you have to say thank you.” She rolled Puppy over playfully and jumped to her feet. “Is it breakfast time now?” “Yes, it is. Cereal for breakfast, is that okay?” “I get a choice?” Rhiannon sounded amazed as she caught up with Bill and put her hand in his. “I never get a choice at home.” “Well, I don’t see why you shouldn’t get a choice.” Bill shrugged and pointed toward a chair. “Sit. I’ll fix the cereal.” “Okay!” Bill winced at how loud the five year old was and stifled a yawn. Where did she get all of that energy? He pulled out the cornflakes and a bowl and dumped the cereal in, splashing some milk on top of it. With a yawn he set it in front of Rhiannon and handed her a spoon. She promptly dug in and grimaced before she spat the half chewed food out into her hand. “Yuck,” she whimpered. “What, what’s wrong with it?” Bill asked, alarmed. “It’s not sweet.” “Oh! Yeah, okay.” He shook his head and pulled over the sugar bowl from the middle of the table. He heaped in two large spoonfuls of sugar and looked at Rhiannon. “Is that good enough?” “Um, more.” Rhiannon nodded her head enthusiastically and watched as Bill continued to put sugar in. “Isn’t that enough?” He began to wonder if she knew what enough was. “I think that’s enough.” “Okay.” She bounced and began to mix up the sugary sludge in her bowl. “It’s good now,” Rhiannon said, beaming. Bill couldn’t help but smile back. “I’m glad. Now I’m going to try and get some coffee before Mister Tom comes down,” he said, in a stage whisper. “Too late, I’m already here!” Tom bounced in and promptly yawned. Rhiannon giggled and sprayed a little milk out of her mouth, and promptly wiped it off with the sleeve of her princess costume. “Cereal, good choice.” Tom leaned over to kiss Bill, but stopped himself before Rhiannon looked up. “I think I’ll have some cereal, too.” He sat next to the five year old and lifted his feet around Puppy’s enthusiastic gnawing of his sneakers. Bill couldn’t help but sit back and watch Tom and Rhiannon interact. It was so adorable, watching his brother act all sweet as the little girl reached her hand up and asked to touch his hair. He was patient and explained his hair and even let her touch a few locks, and tickled her back when she giggled and said they felt dry. This would be their family in a few years. Tom, at the table laughing with Zoe. Maybe she’d be inquisitive, like Rhiannon. Or laid back, like their father, Jorg. Or even bossy, like their mother, Simone. “Mister Bill, why are you crying?” The question snapped him out of his reverie, and Bill laughed as he wiped at his eyes. He hadn’t even realized he’d begun to cry. “Yeah, Rhiannon, I’ll be fine,” he assured her. “Good, because my daddy said that pregnant women cry all the time. That they can’t help it and we’re not supposed to make fun of them unless they’ve been crying all day. Then my mommy hit him and he laughed.” Tom blinked and shook his head. “You just tell everyone everything don’t you?” Rhiannon shrugged and began to bounce in her seat as she finished her cereal. “That was good. Mister Tom, can I go in the living room and watch cartoons?” She bounced harder and Puppy began to bark excitedly. “Sure, I don’t see why not.” Tom watched her pick up the bowl and drink the last of the milk before she dropped the dish. It shattered on the ground and Puppy yelped and ran out of the room. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” Rhiannon looked like she was about to cry, and Bill went over and lifted her out of the chair and onto the floor, on the other side of the broken ceramic. “It’s okay. Are you alright?” Bill crouched in front of the little girl and checked her hands for cuts and made sure he smiled hard until Rhiannon was smiling with him. “Yeah, I’m ok.” “Good. Now go watch cartoons, and we’ll clean this up.” Bill pushed her gently toward the living room and watched her bounce out of the room with a squeal, and could dimly hear Puppy answer her. “She broke the bowl,” he said mournfully. “You don’t care about that bowl,” Tom drawled, and finished the last of his cereal, too. “Tomi, come help me up,” Bill whined, holding his hands out and looking pathetic. Tom laughed and picked Bill up off the ground. “That should teach you not to get into positions you can’t get yourself out of.” “I’ll keep that in mind, when you want sex.” “Hey now, that’s not fair!” Tom protested. They both looked toward the living room when they heard a crash. “Ooops, I’m sorry!” ~*~ It was almost noon, and Rhiannon was practically bouncing off the walls. Tom couldn’t understand; where did she get all of that energy? If he didn’t know any better, he would’ve said she’d had sugar, but he’d been there when Rhiannon had breakfast. She didn’t have any sugar… Puppy and his new toy raced back into the living room, running around the couch where Bill was sprawled out, dead to the world. Tom was a little worried because of the bags under his twin’s eyes, but he couldn’t dwell on it long, with Rhiannon shrieking every few seconds as Puppy caught up with her and tumbled over her shoes or caught onto her costume. “Rhiannon, don’t you want to watch cartoons?” Tom asked desperately, grabbing the little girl around the waist and lifting her up so she couldn’t run. Immediately her hands dove into his locks and pulled with a laugh. “No! I want to play with Puppy!” “Okay. Just quietly. Mister Bill is trying to sleep,” he said with a yawn. He wanted to sleep too, he thought, but that wasn’t going to happen. “Horsey ride!” she shrieked, somewhere in the supersonic range, and Tom winced. “Um, okay. Just one.” “Okay!” Rhiannon clapped as she was transferred to Tom’s back, and he galloped out of the room, Puppy barking happily behind them. *** Four horsey rides later, Tom had a headache from Rhiannon treating his locks as if they were reins, and he lowered her to the ground. She bounced and danced to the commercial on television as Bill yawned and finally woke up. He watched the little girl convulse to the music and looked at Tom like the world had gone mad. “What’s going on? Why do you look all sweaty?” “You try giving horseback rides over and over again, and let’s see how you look,” Tom snapped back. “She’s been bouncing around all day, but I can’t figure out why. You didn’t give her any sugar, did you?” “No,” Bill said slowly, thinking over the morning. “Yes you did, Mister Bill!” Rhiannon said brightly, and bounced over to him with a smile. “In my cereal!” Bill winced, and turned to his twin. “I’m sorry, I totally forgot.” “Now what do we do?” Tom wailed. “Horsey rides!” Rhiannon bellowed, and danced while Puppy stumbled all over her feet. Bill groaned and Tom wished he could just climb into his car and drive away. But then he’d be homeless, because Bill would never let him come back. “Okay, just one horsey ride,” he caved. The five year old clapped and launched herself at Tom’s legs eagerly. “Now, Mister Tom?” “Yeah, now Mister Tom?” Bill yawned and tried to stay awake. Tom shot him a dirty look as he picked Rhiannon up and sighed. “Okay, but just one.” “Right!” Rhiannon dug her heels into his side. “Let’s go, horsey!” ~*~ Marcy rang the doorbell for the fourth time, and huffed irritably. She was about to call her son and find out if she had the right house when the door swung open and a harried, hugely pregnant woman opened the door. No, wait. Not a woman. “Bill?” she asked, hesitantly. “Yes, you’re Greg’s mother, right?” he asked, in heavily accented English. “Yes, I am. I’m here to get-” “Grandma!” Marcy blinked as a pink blur raced out of the door and into her arms. “Hey, baby girl! How are you doing?” “Fine!” Rhiannon bellowed, and kicked her legs happily. “Now, what did I tell you about kicking people?” Marcy asked sternly. “Sorry.” Rhiannon calmed down, and Marcy placed her back on the ground. “Good, go get your bag, we’re going to the hospital to see your brother!” Rhiannon squealed and nodded, and raced around Tom’s legs to go run upstairs. “You gave her sugar, didn’t you?” Marcy asked, amused. “It was him.” Tom jerked his thumb toward Bill as he came to stand beside him. “I did not know.” “Well, now you know.” Marcy smiled as Rhiannon returned and launched herself at her legs. Puppy slid between the twins and tried to follow, but Tom scooped him up and tried to avoid his little red tongue. “Molly’s still in labor, but I hear she’s expected to deliver in the next few hours. Greg said he’d give you a call when the baby comes.” “Thank you,” Bill nodded with a smile as Rhiannon waved like a madwoman. He waved back, and watched with relief as Marcy took her grandchild to the waiting taxi. He closed the door to find Tom pacing, Puppy trailing close behind him. “I can’t believe such a small person could wear me out like that.” Tom shook his head. “Zoe’s not going to be like that.” “She probably will be. We were both a little hyper when we were really young,” Bill reminded him. “Fuck. No candy of any kind. She can’t even know it exists. No horsey rides, either. My head is killing me because Rhiannon kept pulling on them. And she wouldn’t stop talking. Everything she did had to be yelled or screamed or squealed. Oh god, my ears are bleeding.” Bill just smiled, and took Tom by the hand to lead him toward the stairs. “And she’ll only be able to watch educational shows. God, I love cartoons too, but four hours straight? My brain is going to fall out of my ears. And all she wanted to watch was SpongeBob!” Bill tugged Tom’s tee shirt over his head, and his twin barely took a breath. “She just kept running everywhere. She was awake so early… and…” Tom yawned as he allowed himself to be pulled into the bed. Without a thought he wrapped his arms around all of Bill he could reach, and began to rub gently on his stomach. “Sleep, Tomi,” Bill breathed in his ear, and Tom couldn’t respond as he tumbled into slumber. ~*~ Bill opened his eyes and bit back a scream as he felt his stomach tighten past the point of pain. He breathed deeply, trying to remain calm, but the only thing he could think of was this is it. This was it! “Tomi!” he screamed, shaking his brother so hard he rolled over. “What?” Tom asked irritably. The sun had gone down now; they’d slept for the rest of the day. Tom still felt like he could use more sleep, but he yawned and reached over to turn on the lamp. “What’s wrong?” “I think it’s time to go to the hospital, ourselves.” Bill shifted and gasped at the sharp, needle like pains. Tom blinked and scrambled out of the bed. “We’ve got to get the bag! Get your purse!” he yelled, and practically dove into Bill’s closet for the Dior bag at the back. Bill sighed and reached for his phone. He was swinging his feet over the side of the bed when he was wracked with more pain. Bill moaned low and tried to breathe, but the pain intensified and he cried out, reaching his hand for Tom. Tom crouched in front of Bill and grabbed it, and Bill squeezed until the pain passed. “Are you okay?” he asked, eyes wide. Bill growled at him. “No, I’m not fucking okay! Get the car, I’ll call Doctor Robert.” Bill picked up his phone and began to dial. “Do you need help getting down the stairs?” “No, I think I can do it. I’ll just take it slow,” Bill said as he waved him off. The call connected and he tried not to be nervous. “Doctor Robert, I think it’s time, isn’t it too early?” “Bill, we as doctors give babies due dates, but they come whenever they want. If Zoe wants out, then let’s do our best to honor her wish. I’ll meet you at the hospital as soon as I throw my clothes on. And Bill?” “Yeah?” His voice was shaking, but he couldn’t calm down. “It’s going to be okay. Alright?” “Yeah. Oh shit!” Bill screamed and grabbed onto the bed post. The pain was unbearable, and was worse than before. He moaned, and was about to say that something was wrong until he passed gas. It was hard, and loud, and it even hurt a bit on the way out, but suddenly Bill felt tons lighter, and there was no pain. He couldn’t believe it. He was in a daze, and suddenly he could hear Doctor Robert yelling his name. “I’m sorry, Doctor,” Bill said in relief. “I think it was a false alarm.” “You passed gas, didn’t you?” “Yes. I hope you’re not angry.” “Bill, you didn’t know. Besides, this has happened to me more than once. Get some rest, okay?” “Okay, thanks.” Bill hung up the phone sheepishly, and went down the stairs as quickly as possible. When he reached the living room, he saw that Tom left the door open. He smiled and stuck his head out the door, to yell to his twin to come back to bed; it was just a false alarm. But there was no car in the driveway. Tom was gone. “He left me!” Bill squeaked, and shook his head. He dialed Tom’s number quickly, and paused. He heard Samy Deluxe in the kitchen, and groaned. Oh well, he was going back to sleep. ~*~ “Play it again!” Gustav crowed. “That is too funny.” Georg obediently replayed the footage of a barefoot, boxers and tee shirt clad, hatless, Tom fighting his way back to his car with Bill’s Dior bag in his hand. “Oh god, I don’t think my stomach can handle it.” “I tried to congratulate Tom on his wonderful fashion choices, but he hung up on me, twice.” Georg pretended to pout as he checked the youtube stats. “It’s already at a hundred thousand views.” “Beautiful.” “What I want to know is, how’d they all get there that fast?” “Tobi said that the press know that Bill could go into labor at any time, so they’re just camping out at the hospital he’s going to deliver at.” “They should change it.” “Tobi suggested it, and Bill threatened to de-man him.” “Ouch,” the bassist winced. “So he backed off.” “I do believe his wife still wants children.” “Smart man.” Georg abandoned his laptop to sit next to Gustav on the couch, and pulled him close. Usually the blond would smile and lean into his touch, but now he looked preoccupied. “What’s on your mind?” he asked lightly. “Nothing really; just thinking over a conversation I had with Sabrina. I don’t know what to make of it.” Gustav shrugged. “Well, then tell me. Maybe I can help.” “No, it’s kind of personal. I couldn’t do that to Sabrina.” Georg nodded. “Yeah, that makes sense.” “Good.” Gustav nodded and shrugged out of Georg’s hold, and went to get some coffee. When he got back, Georg was looking at him oddly. “What’s wrong with you?” “Um, I’ve been trying to figure out how to tell you this, so I guess I’ll just say it. I think I found a girl I want to get serious with.” “Really?” Gustav blinked in confusion, then broke out in the rarely seen, wide grin that made him look years younger. “Are you serious? I didn’t even know you were seeing anybody! Why didn’t you tell me, you ass!” He punctuated his words with a smack to Georg’s bicep as he sat on the coffee table next to the bassist’s laptop. “I never seemed to find the right way,” Georg muttered. “Well, that’s a load off of my mind. I was trying to tell you the same thing, but whenever I did… I felt kind of weird. I didn’t want to leave you hanging, you know? But now, it’s different.” Gustav nodded and rose, pulling his phone out of his back pocket. “I’m going to call Sabrina now. Dude, you and whoever her name is needs to double date. I know it’s corny, but hell, it should be fun.” Georg kept his patented smirk until he could hear Gustav’s door close behind him. ~*~ “The best one we have?” the sales person asked again, just to be sure. “Yes,” Tom said as he nodded. “And anything else I’ll need with it. I want to be able to take really clear movies and pictures. I don’t care what it costs.” He flashed his platinum card and the sales person’s knees almost buckled. “Right this way sir, to the professional section.” “Hell yeah, I like that. Professional.” ~*~ Tom looked at the booklet for the fourth time, and wondered why the instructions were in Swedish. Then he flipped it over and found the German, and finally figured out what he was trying to do. The ‘on’ button was on top and said… on. Look at that. He flipped it on, and turned the view screen around so he could see what he was filming. “This is awesome,” he said, and cleared his throat. “This is Tom Kaulitz, your father, and…” Tom frowned and paused the recording. “I can’t call myself that on camera,” he muttered as he deleted the file and started over again. “This is Tom Kaulitz, your uncle, and this is what our house looked like before you got here.” He was surprised to find that he didn’t actually choke on the word uncle, and maybe he could get through that when the time came for his daughter to give him a title. He panned around the living room, and caught Puppy on the couch, all four feet in the air. “That’s our dog, soon to be your dog too, if you’d just hurry up and come out.” Tom turned and jogged upstairs, and went into the nursery. “This is your room. Your dad got a little carried away with the whole color scheme, but it looks better than I would’ve thought. He made me donate all your toys to charity, so when you grow up and have no toys, you can blame him.” He left and closed the door behind him, and snuck into their bedroom. The lights were dim, but Tom didn’t pay six hundred Euros to not have to not have night vision. Bill was curled up on his side, sleeping uncomfortably with a hand resting on his lower abdomen. “Doesn’t your dad look uncomfortable?” Tom whispered. Bill had been complaining of backaches and fatigue for the past few days, and with their show coming up in two more days, Tom was a bit worried. Every time he’d bring up cancelling the show, Bill would have to get all reasonable and mention that they’d already been paid for the show, and how the label would not excuse it happening so close to the show just because he was tired. And then, to make matters worse, Bill would kiss him until all the fight would leave. Sneaky, underhanded tactics. Tom smiled and reached out to touch the back of Bill’s hand. He steadied the camera and trained it on his twin. “See, Bill can’t sleep on his back anymore, or in his favorite position, his stomach. Because you’re in there.” He reached out and touched Bill’s stomach. It looked even huger from behind the camera, and Tom watched himself rub his twin’s stomach through the viewfinder. “I can’t wait to see you, and I know your dad can’t wait either.” Bill sniffed and farted, and Tom gagged before he moved away from the bed. “I’ll have to buy new sheets, since Bill just burned a hole in them. You cause him the worst gas, but I know he doesn’t mind, because he can’t smell it. I’m kidding. A little.” “Tomi?” Tom turned the camera toward Bill’s face as he yawned wide. “Oh, that’s attractive,” he teased. “Where’d you get the camera, and why were you whispering?” Bill blinked at him sleepily, and Tom grinned. “I bought it, and I was trying not to wake you.” Tom shrugged sheepishly. “Oh.” Bill looked at his brother for a few moments more, and finally woke up a bit. “I’m hungry,” he said quietly. “Melinda made some of those quesadillas that you like. The ones with the pickles in them.” Bill smiled and turned away from the camera. “I want McDonalds,” he whispered. “Why are you being all cute?” Tom was dumbfounded. If Bill wasn’t pregnant he would’ve had him on his back. “Because you’re sweeter to me when I’m cute.” Bill pulled him closer and rubbed his wrist. “You manipulate me.” “Hey, you had a ten minute head start,” Bill joked. “Fine. Come on, I’ll find your shoes and we’ll go.” “No, I don’t want to go. Just go get it, and I can eat it here. I don’t want to move.” Bill yawned again, and Tom turned off the camera. “Are you okay? You’re exhausted lately, and the past few days have been worse.” “I don’t know. I’m just sleepy. I have no energy and no desire to do anything.” “So how are you going to play the show?” “God, just drop it,” Bill said irritably. “I want to play the show. I’ll be fine. That’s why I’m sleeping now. Now go get me some chicken nuggets,” he said as he closed his eyes. Tom waited skeptically until Bill looked at him again. “I’m waiting on the rest!” he retorted. “I’m not stupid enough to think you only want chicken nuggets.” “Ass. Fine, two twenty piece chicken nuggets, four apple pies, and a Big Mac. No, two Big Macs and get me a milkshake. Actually, no milk shake, get me a coke. Yes, coke.” Bill nodded and kicked his feet happily. “Now go, before I fall asleep again. And even if I do, I still want the food.” He smiled as Tom gave him a wet kiss on the cheek. “Get out, nasty,” he said happily, and waved. “And hurry back!” “Your wish is my command,” Tom snorted, and trotted back out to the car. He closed the door and looked at all the bags covering the back seat and in the trunk. He didn’t tell Bill that he’d bought more toys; he walked past the toy store and couldn’t help it. Oh well, he’d only be a dad once. Tom could go a little crazy. ~*~ “I could kill him.” Tom was pacing in the green room, and from the looks of things, would quite soon walk a hole in the carpet. “I heard they sold more than twice the capacity, so they moved it to a bigger venue.” Gustav wiggled his eyebrows and effectively dismissed himself from the conversation as he plugged his earbuds in and cranked up his iPod. “I’m not really sure how a laid back, acoustic set is going to go over with twenty thousand fans,” Georg muttered as he bounced his knee. He was incredibly sleepy, ever since they’d arrived and everyone realized it was not the same venue that they’d rehearsed in. Tom’s anger had boiled over with liquid voracity, consuming everything in its path. But the one person he wanted hadn’t arrived yet. The crowd was deafening from here, and Bill couldn’t help but smile as he heard the cheers, even as he had to suppress a yawn. “It’ll be okay, Tomi,” he muttered, and shifted so his back would stop screaming at him. Lo and behold, a few moments later the same position would make his back hurt and he would have to shift again. “Shit, they couldn’t get a new couch?” he griped. “We should just cancel,” Tom pleaded as he came to sit next to Bill. “I don’t care what we have to do, I’m serious.” Bill just patted him on the knee and smiled. Everyone looked up as someone knocked on the door; it was Andreas, followed closely by Tobi. “Bill, where is Melinda?” he asked, tersely. “She’s doing her job, I guess,” Tom answered instead. “She said she was searching the perimeter.” “Good. Some paparazzi snuck through the press barricade, and they’re roaming around. If someone knocks on the door and they’re not accompanied by me, then don’t let them in.” “Gotcha,” Georg said, and promptly leaned back against the couch and went to sleep. Bill thought Georg had the right idea, and leaned on Tom’s shoulder and felt himself drifting off. “Dude, you really must be sleepy. You didn’t go to sleep last night?” Andreas asked as he sat on the coffee table across from the twins. “He did,” Tom said darkly. “He’s just really tired. Doctor Robert said that it was normal, so close to the delivery. Then he advised us again that we shouldn’t be doing this.” The guitarist and the blond looked up as they heard stomping and chanting. “They are gagging for it, man,” Andreas muttered as he shook his head. “I don’t know how they’ll deal with it just being an acoustic set.” “I don’t care.” Tom rested his cheek on the top of Bill’s head and sighed. “But I gotta admit, I can’t wait to play.” “I know you can’t.” Andreas smiled and nudged Bill’s foot with his own. “Wake up, sleepy. You’re about to go on in ten minutes.” “I want to be in bed,” Bill whined, and opened his eyes to see Tom looking very smug. “Oh hush. I know when I get out there; I’ll feel awake and ready to go.” ~~ Tom was pissed. He was more than pissed. David still hadn’t arrived yet, so he had to settle on blowing up at his tech when he handed him an electric guitar. “What the fuck is this?” he asked as he pushed the guitar back. “Acoustic, man. Acoustic.” “Not according to what the production manager told me. He said we’re going electric.” “Okay, now that’s just silly,” Gustav burst out. “What do they expect, for Bill to bounce around on stage like that?” “Gee, thanks Gustav,” Bill said sourly. “I’m just standing right next to you. I told you guys I looked ridiculous in this get up.” Bill had his hair spiked high, and close fitting black material with silver ornaments draped over him. He almost looked like his old self again, but the closer he got to the stage, the less sure he was. “You know what I mean. Not that, but pregnant; happy?” “Very. But what’s going on?” “The label wants it electric, but they said Bill could still sit in his chair.” David rushed up, looking apologetic. “I just came from their offices; when I got the changes I went right down there and tried to do something about it, but if I had continued, they would’ve fired me, and I don’t need that right now.” “We don’t care that you’re funding girlfriend number two hundred and seventy. Bill can’t do an electric set, period,” Tom thundered. “Look, he can still sit in his chair, I mean, that’s the best I could do.” “Fuck, we’re going to look crazy.” “No, we won’t. Come on, we’ve kept them waiting long enough.” Bill squared his shoulders resolutely, and braced his lower back with his hand and ambled toward the stage. Tom growled and turned back to David. “This isn’t over.” “Of course not,” the older man said calmly, and Tom stalked off after his brother, Gustav and Georg trailing right behind. ~*~ Okay, so technically Bill was supposed to have stayed in the chair. But he couldn’t help it. The music demanded that he move, and so move, he did. The crowd was insane, screaming their heads off and moving in time with the music. It was just like old times, and this reminded Bill why he loved what he did. Arenahalle was packed to the brim, and even with the larger stadium, they overbooked. He moved with the music as best he could, and grinned at the camera that captured his face and blew it up a thousand times. Bill tried not to think of his fat face meters high, and the crowd distracted him nicely. “How are you, Berlin?” he screamed, and the audience screamed back. “Thank you so much for having us. We all missed entertaining you so much, and we’re just happy to be here!” Bill tried not to grimace as he felt his lower back twinge. “Now, we’re going to slow it down. I can’t move around as well because of Zoe.” He let the crowd go wild as so many people hefted signs that said Can’t wait to see you, Zoe and Baby watch ‘08 on them. “So bear with me, I need to sit down.” The crowd cheered again as Tom appeared at his back, and helped him into the high chair. “Are you okay?” Bill nodded quickly and flashed a smile at the crowd. “That feels heavenly,” he said as he wiped the sweat from his brow. “Our next song is… Reden!” The crowd screamed again as Bill bobbed his head to the intro and began to sing. He felt a little out of breath but used the exercises that his vocal coach taught him after the surgery to try and maintain a steady breathing pattern. But soon, it was obvious that there was something wrong. Tom frowned over at him, and quite suddenly, the pain from that night was back, and it was a hundred times worse. He couldn’t help but cry out, and Tom practically dropped his guitar to come and grab his hand. “This isn’t gas, Tomi,” Bill said fearfully. “This is real!” The rest of the music died away as their band mates realized that Bill was having trouble. Georg rushed over, and the house lights came up. “What’s wrong? Bill, you look pale.” “Zoe’s coming,” he gritted out, and the crowd went wild. Tom looked up in confusion, until he realized that Bill still held the mic in his hand. “Come on, we’re getting out of here.” Melinda appeared next to him, and helped Tom ease Bill out of the chair. “My car is ready at the exit. If we leave now, the press will watch us pull off.” She gathered Bill around the waist gently and helped them shuffle across the stage. “It’s time?” Georg asked nervously. Gustav stood beside him and Andreas ran up from backstage. “Yes,” Tom said tersely. “Bill, could you walk any faster?” “I would, but it fucking hurts to move,” Bill gritted out. “Do you want to do this? Because then you could complain how fast we’re moving,” he snapped. “Oh, I want Mom, I want Mom!” Tom went to move for his phone when Bill stopped him. “NO, don’t let go, I can’t do this without you, Tomi.” “Andreas-” “On it.” The blond trailed after them as they slowly made their way to the exit. Their group gathered more members as they passed the crew. “I’m praying for you, Bill,” someone called out, and he mustered up a smile and waved. More well wishers flanked them on both sides so when a flash went off in Bill’s line of vision, there were three roadies on the photographer before Tobi could take a threatening step forward. Tom was overwhelmed by the outpour of love; he knew that their crew was like family, but the looks of love and brief touches on the arm or shoulder let him know they were behind them one hundred percent. Tobi opened the exit door and fell back under the barrage of flashes and screams of Bill’s name. “How the fuck did they know we were coming out this way?” Bill muttered as Melinda huffed angrily. He grimaced, and cried out as another contraction hit. His knees buckled, and Tom fell down to his knees with him. All Bill could do was moan weakly until the pain let up. “Bill, are you okay?” Tobi asked. “Stop fucking asking that question!” Bill took a deep breath and whimpered. He felt like his back was on fire, and his legs were no longer listening to him. “Pick him up,” Tom ordered, and Bill tried to protest, when his twin cut him off. “Shut up. Melinda,” he turned to their bodyguard, “Get us out of here, any way you see fit.” “My pleasure.” Melinda pulled out her stun gun and kicked the door out. Everyone heard the loud swears as the door knocked into equipment and photographers. “Take one step closer, and I won’t hesitate to fry everyone. We’re going to the hospital, get out of our way.” She leveled the taser at the near constant bursts of light, but no one came closer. Unfortunately, they didn’t really move, and had the van surrounded. Tobi brought Bill out, curled around his shoulders as he hid his face in the bodyguard’s neck and tried to remember how to breathe. Tom had his hand on his back and Andreas, Gustav, and Georg were close behind. “Back up!” Melinda stepped up to an overeager paparazzo, who merely smirked and pushed forward for an exclusive shot. She did not hesitate to press the gun to his chest and pull the trigger. The man dropped to the ground with a strangled scream and a scorch mark on his shirt as he tried to crawl away with jumping muscles. Once Melinda realized she had everyone’s wary attention, she made a brief show of turning up the settings. “Next person to take a step closer will found out how it feels to have third degree contact burns, and next time, I’m aiming where the sun doesn’t shine.” She glanced back at Tobi. “Everyone in?” “Yes.” He closed the van’s sliding door. “Good. You drive.” She pulled out a pair of leather gloves and put them on quickly. “Everyone move out of the way!” There were photographers taking pictures in front of the van, with what looked like no intention of leaving their positions until they had the shot they wanted.” Melinda wanted to scream. Bill was a scared teenager that was about to have a baby, that couldn’t have the baby until he was at the hospital. Didn’t they understand that? Fine; she would make them understand. Melinda ran to the front of the van and sat on the hood, bracing herself and pointing her stun gun at the photographers in their way. “Move,” she ground out, and pulled the trigger. The electricity crackled and the men hastily moved out of the way. “I think Melinda needs to have my children,” Gustav breathed, and they began to make slow progress through the thick crowd. The path began to clear as the bodyguard made good on her threat, and tased a few people in the way of the van, and then suddenly it was easier to drive. Tobi rolled down the passenger window, and as soon as they entered traffic, she climbed through and Tobi picked up speed. “How are you doing, Bill?” she asked, over her shoulder. “I’m good, I think.” Bill breathed and held Tom’s hand harder. “It doesn’t hurt so much right now. Not as bad as during the contractions.” “When was the last contraction?” “Oh shit; we were supposed to keep up with that, weren’t we?” Andreas asked, groaning. “It was a few minutes ago,” Gustav offered helpfully. “Need to be a bit more specific for-” “Argh! Shit!” Bill screamed, and squeezed the crap out of his twin’s hand as he was wracked with another contraction. He whimpered until Bill slumped back, out of breath and dazed. “Bill, are you okay?” Tom touched his twin’s cheek, and was concerned that it took so much energy for Bill to focus. “What’s wrong?” he asked quietly, leaning closer. “I don’t know if I can do this, Tomi. It’s harder than I thought.” Tom was going to reply, when a flash went off behind his head. A man in a motorcycle was endangering his own life by trying to get pictures of inside the van. “What the fuck, are you serious?” Georg slammed his hand against the window at the moan, but the paparazzo paid no attention. The photographer wove in and out of incoming traffic, as both Melinda and Tobi cursed. “What is this idiot doing?” Tobi thundered. “I have a bad feeling about this,” Gustav muttered, and before Andreas could retort sarcastically, the car in front of them slammed on their breaks to avoid the man on the motorcycle. Tobi swore louder, and tried to avoid them, but the car behind shoved them hard, and they had no choice but to slam into the car ahead of them. “Bill, are you alright?” he asked quickly. “Tomi, I can’t… I can’t…” Bill started to hyperventilate. “I’m calling emergency services.” Melinda pulled out her phone and dialed the number. The photographer made the mistake of getting too close to the van, and she got out and pressed her taser to his back. He dropped like a sack and she kicked his camera away. “Bill, please calm down,” Andreas pleaded. He could see his best friend turning red in the face as he fought with the seatbelt. “I need air,” Bill gasped. “Let me out!” “Bill, breathe,” Tom said loudly, trying to unbuckle the seatbelt. It finally gave and as Bill struggled to get out of the van, Tobi and Melinda both flanked him. Tobi had his gun out, and was watching the scene warily as Melinda was barking orders to the rest of their security team. The press that was following them to the hospital successfully stopped traffic behind them, and were snapping pictures of the panicked faces of the band, and the determined expressions of their security. “Emergency services are on their way, Bill,” Tobi reported as Tom rubbed Bill’s back and tried to keep his face away from the cameras. There were flashes going off at a near hysterical level as the growing crowd gathered closer. More security showed up, and Tom breathed a sigh of relief as they pushed the crowd back. Bill doubled over and screamed as another contraction hit, and the ambulance finally pulled up, crossing over from the other side of the street. It seemed like it took forever for them to load Bill up, and Tom couldn’t breathe correctly until the doors of the ambulance closed and they were finally on their way. “You really are Bill Kaulitz, aren’t you?” One of the medics asked. He looked star struck as tested Bill’s blood pressure. “Is there any way I could get an autograph when you’re not in the middle of a contraction?” “Are you fucking serious?” There was sweat on Bill’s face, and even his waterproof makeup was starting to run. “I’m having a baby and you want a fucking autograph?” Bill huffed and tried to breathe deeply. “Just give me the damn drugs so I won’t feel this anymore.” “We can’t administer those; your obstetrician has to.” “So basically you’re saying you’re worthless,” Bill snapped. The medic opened his mouth to retort, and he cut him off. “I want drugs!” he screamed. Tom sat there, dumbfounded as his brother basically pitched a fit. “I’m sorry, I can’t help you. Just don’t push yet.” “Where the hell would I be pushing to, asshole?” Bill screeched. “Bill, just try to relax, we’ll be there soon,” Tom reassured his twin, trying to get him to back off of the unfortunate medic. ~*~ “Would everyone stop telling me to calm down? I am fucking calm!” Bill screamed as another contraction hit. They were getting longer and more intense, and the breathing exercises weren’t working anymore. “Fuck, where’s Doctor Robert?” “He’s trying to-” “He’s right here,” the doctor interrupted as he swept into the room. “Bill, how are you doing?” “I’m going to kill someone,” the teen said simply as Simone sponged off the sweat from his forehead as Tom held his hand. That was all Bill wanted him to do. If he even looked like he wanted to step away, or give his hand a rest, Bill would screech and cry. “I’m sure you do. We’re going to get you into pre-op, so we can prepare you for the cesarean, alright? All your signs look good, and you’re as ready as you’re going to be.” Doctor Robert pressed down on Bill’s stomach on either side, and nodded happily when the vocalist hissed and swatted his hands away. “She’s in an excellent position, too. If you were equipped, we could’ve made this a vaginal birth.” The man was smart enough to move away as Bill reached for him angrily. “You can have two people in the operating room with you, so go ahead and decide.” “Two? I thought it was only one.” “No, it can be two; I have to borrow Tom for a moment. So select the person who will stay with you.” Doctor Robert motioned for Tom to follow him. “Send Andi in here!” Bill said quickly, and bit his lip so he could let his twin’s hand go. He felt panicked momentarily, as their mother darted away to the waiting room where their friend was waiting with David, Georg, Gustav, Melinda and Tobi. Tom reluctantly followed Doctor Robert down the hall. “Where are we going?” “We’re going to draw some blood. Usually men lose a lot of blood during childbirth, so as a uniquely suited donor for Bill, we wanted to get a bit so we can be ready at a moments notice.” “So it’s normal if he loses some blood?” “All men lose some blood. We don’t know why some lose less than others, but we don’t want to take any chances.” “Doctor, nothing’s going to happen to Bill, right?” Tom asked, hesitantly. “We’re taking every precaution to make sure nothing does.” “I’ve read enough contracts to know what that means.” “But that’s the best I can do.” “I can’t lose him, Doctor. He’s all I have.” Doctor Robert stopped in front of a door and let Tom walk ahead of him. “You can’t think that way anymore; Zoe will be here soon, and you’ll have her to deal with too. We’re as prepared as we can be, trust me, I know what’s at stake. What’s always at stake.” Tom nodded and took off his jacket. “Take however much you need.” ~*~ “Bill, are you ready?” He didn’t know where the voice was coming from until the nurse appeared in his line of sight with a smile on her face. “You can’t feel anything now, right?” Bill shook his head. “Good. We’ll start in just a moment. Your vitals are good, and so are Zoe’s. She’s ready to come on out.” “We can’t start without my brother. Andreas, we can’t start without Tom!” Bill turned his head to look at his best friend. “Don’t let them cut me without Tom here.” “Bill, they’re going to have to operate soon, even if Tom’s not here.” The blond held Bill’s hand tightly and tried to get him to calm down. “But I’m here.” “I know, but it’s not the same. I want Tomi,” Bill whimpered. “So, you’ve got me.” Bill turned to see Tom grab his other hand. He was in a pair of scrubs, like Andreas, and his hair was pulled back, without the cap. “You didn’t think I’d let you do this on your own, did you?” “Bill, are we ready?” Doctor Robert came into view, and for the first time, Bill could finally answer in the affirmative. “Well, let’s meet Zoe, shall we?” Bill turned to Tom and squeezed his hand. “Don’t you leave me again,” he whispered. “Never,” Tom reassured him. Doctor Robert began fairly quickly; Andreas was brave enough to watch over the partition, his face was pale as he watched them slice into his best friend’s stomach. Tom couldn’t bear to watch; he pressed his forehead against Bill’s and stared into his eyes while he squeezed his hand and tried to remain calm. There was silence in the room until quite suddenly, Andreas gasped. “There she is…” he breathed, and the quiet was pierced by a wail. Tom stood up, and watched the doctor lift out a bloody, mucous covered baby. Zoe had a high pitched squeal and lungs that rivaled her father’s. Tom couldn’t stop blinking the tears away as the nurses took his daughter to get cleaned up and checked over. “She’s beautiful,” he managed to choke out. “Bill you should see her.” “I want to see her,” Bill whispered, and Tom knelt down and kissed his temple. “I want to see her, Tomi.” “They’ll bring her right over,” Doctor Robert nodded as he worked. “We’re halfway done. We’ll remove the afterbirth, and the protowomb; then seal you up.” “Tomi, I’m tired.” Tom watched his twin’s eyes flicker, and he gripped his hand tighter. “Stay with me, Bill, you’ve got to see her. You’ve got to see her for yourself!” “Tomi…” “Bill? Bill!” Tom nudged him gently when his eyes fluttered shut. Bill struggled to open his eyes again, but they closed against his will. “Bill!”

Chapter End Notes:

Again, I want to thank my readers and reviewers. You've kept me going when I'd gotten fed up with Pregnant!Bill. ;) Lynn, thanks for listening.

Author's Chapter Notes:

Depends on what you're asking.

“Some press tried to sneak into the maternity ward yesterday. Melinda was so furious she reamed out the hospital security. You should’ve seen it.” Tom smiled and adjusted Bill’s covers. “Grandma held Zoe and said that she should’ve been called Lily Zoe Kaulitz. Mom won’t stop crying. Dad won’t stop crying. Even Gordon had tears in his eyes when he held Zoe. They’re all in love with her, even Tobi. He won’t hold her, he’s a big wimp; but he stands there and looks at her, and sometimes he smiles. Isn’t that funny?” Bill did not answer. “I thought so, too. I can’t wait for you to wake up. The doctors say there is no reason why you should be asleep. Everything’s fine now. They stopped the bleeding. They’d even found another growth that they couldn’t see before. It’s gone now, too. Doctor Robert says he thinks your system just needs to reboot. That’s why I’m not worried. You haven’t seen Zoe yet, so you’re not going anywhere. And even if you did, I’m not kidding Bill; I would have no choice but to follow you.” Tom paused and looked over at the sleeping newborn on the other side of the bed. “Zoe is so pretty to be bald and wrinkly, and she cries a lot when she’s awake. I tried feeding her for the first time. She eats so little, but often. I was told that would change, as her stomach grew. I put her next to you, on the bed. Did you feel her? She stopped crying then. She knows her mom,” he joked. The smile on his face faded, and Tom rubbed the back of Bill’s hand. “Well, it’s time for bed.” The door opened quietly and a nurse walked in with a small smile. “Having your visit?” “Yep, but we’re done.” “I’ll take Zoe to the nursery, now.” “Thank you.” Tom stood up and walked over to the sleeping infant. “Goodnight, Zoe,” he said quietly, taking her tiny hand between two fingers. His daughter closed her fist around the tip of his first finger, and let him go. Tom turned and watched until the door closed behind the nurse, and he sighed heavily. “Bill, we’re going to be able to take her home soon. I want to be able to take you home, too. So hurry up and wake up. I miss you.” Still no response. Tom sighed and dimmed the lights, pulling off his jacket and cap. He’d requested that Bill be brought to a double room, so he wouldn’t have to leave him at night. Every morning for the past three days he’d wake up, hoping to see Bill’s eyes open and looking at him; and every morning for the past three days he’d been disappointed, but not defeated. Not yet. ~*~ “How’s he doing?” Andreas asked, slumped low in his seat as he tried to avoid the flashes. The paparazzi had followed him and Tom to the small café across the street from the hospital, both sick and tired of the food served in the cafeteria. “The same. Just… asleep. Mom wanted to talk full time care at home, the fans are panicked, and David’s hyperventilating every other minute. But he knows if he says anything, I’ll break my foot off in his ass.” Tom rubbed his eyes from behind the sunglasses and looked down at his coffee. “Your mother came by earlier.” “I apologize for whatever she did, ahead of time,” the blond deadpanned. “Actually, she was really nice. She offered to go to our house and pick up some things for Zoe, so she doesn’t have to wear the hospital clothes. I think Bill would really appreciate that. Maybe she’s calmed down.” “Hope so. Our house is totally surrounded by photographers. She understands now the pressure you guys were under.” “You too, sometimes.” “But only sometimes. I can’t even take a nap, without closing the curtains. Our house is always dark now because my mother put up the black curtains. It looks like we’re in mourning.” Tom’s smile faded, and he looked away. “Shit man, I’m sorry. You know I think Bill will pull through. We both know he wouldn’t do all that work and then not see the end result.” Andreas leaned forward. “He knows he has to stick around for you and Zoe.” “I hope so. Everyone else telling me different is really making it difficult to continue to think that way. Even Doctor Robert says that we might have to take Bill home and see how he does. Get a nurse. We might have to get a nurse if he doesn’t wake up. And the longer it takes for him to wake up, the less likely it is. I want to shake him, and go, ‘what are you doing? Don’t you know you have a daughter now?’ but I can’t, because it’s not his fault. But I blame him, and I don’t know why.” Andreas sighed. “When there’s no one to blame, you still try to find someone. Just don’t give up; you and I both know that Bill is extraordinary. When they tell him he can’t, he makes sure to do it perfectly, just to throw it back in their faces.” “Yeah.” “Now come on. Its Zoe’s feeding time, and I haven’t gotten a chance to do it yet. I’ve got to get used to feeding her.” “I don’t want to go through that mob.” Tom looked up, and the cameras went off. “I’m sick and tired of all this shit.” “Let’s sneak out the back. I saw another exit.” “They’ll be waiting for that, too.” Tom shook his head sourly. “Not that exit, but the fire exit. I asked the chick behind the counter. She said it doesn’t really work, so they won’t be expecting us through there. Come on, its right by the bathrooms.” Andreas tugged the guitarist to his feet. “Maybe I’ll get something for Bill. I think he’d like a sugar cookie, or a piece of cake.” ~~ “Cake sounds good,” Bill murmured, and opened his eyes. His body felt tight, and unused, and his body creaked and cracked as he moved his legs and arms. Why was he so tired? “Tomi?” he called out, and blanched at the sound coming from his throat. He cleared it and tried again. “Tomi?” Still no answer. Bill sat up and rubbed his stomach, and promptly looked down. He was no longer pregnant. The last thing he remembered was Tom telling him something about Zoe… but he couldn’t remember… “Where’s my baby?” he asked aloud, but there was no one in the room to answer the question. Bill eased his legs to the side of the bed and stood shakily. As soon as he’d gotten his balance back, he noticed the I.V. in his arm, and winced as he pulled it out. He felt better already, and looked around the room. The television at the top of the wall was muted, on some action movie, and on the other bed were a discarded hoodie and the bag he packed. Bill pulled out a pair of slippers and wiggled his toes once they were in them, and paused at the hoodie. He picked it up and held it close; it smelled like his twin, and safety and he breathed deeply while he stretched. Where was his brother? And where was Zoe? Bill pulled on the hoodie, zipped it up and walked out of the room. ~*~ Nurse Meyer cursed lightly as she dropped her pen, and crouched down to pick it up. As she rose, she caught a glimpse of a hoodie, and frowned. She didn’t know that Tom had returned. He usually said hello before he went back to Bill’s room. With a shrug, she sat down to continue her paperwork. ~*~ “Can I help you?” Bill looked up and nodded. “I’m here to see Zoe?” “And you are?” The nurse asked kindly. “I’m her… I’m Bill Kaulitz,” he finished, unsure of what exactly to call himself. “Oh! I didn’t recognize you; of course, come in.” Bill wiped at his face and tried to tame his hair; his face was puffy and his hair uncooperative without a comb and some serious time. But his hands were shaking too hard and he tried to keep breathing as he followed the nurse further into the nursery. He slowed down and looked at every bassinet, wondering if he would recognize Zoe if he saw her. Did guys get to have that too? Or was it just female mothers? Was he a mother? “Mister Kaulitz?” Bill snapped out of his thoughts apologetically and continued after the woman. “Oh, there she is,” he breathed. Never mind she had a sign on the side of the clear bed that said “Zoe Kaulitz”; he would’ve recognized her anywhere. The thought brought tears to his eyes, and he wiped at his face again. “You’ll need to wash your hands, and take off the jacket.” “Why is she screaming like that?” “She wants some attention.” “Oh.” Bill shook a little as he removed the hoodie and washed his hands at the station the nurse pointed out to him. After he’d used more paper towels than necessary, he turned to his daughter with a gulp. He was going to hold Zoe, actually hold her for the first time. “Would you like to sit down in the rocking chair? Mister Vericht and your brother come here often. She’s quite popular with the stream of people coming to view her at the window.” "When?" He frowned. "When you were asleep." "Oh..." Bill nodded shakily. “She has a lot of family. Can I sit down before you give her to me? I don’t want to drop her.” “Of course; it’s fine. I’ll go get her.” Bill nodded again and sat in the chair, rocking back and forth nervously. “Here she is!” He found himself in shock as the small blanket was placed in his arms, and Zoe’s screaming just faded away as she fisted the air almost angrily. Her face was red from her crying, and Bill blinked back the tears. “Have you decided to breastfeed or continue with the formula?” Bill looked up warily. “What has she been drinking so far?” “Formula.” He sighed. “She doesn’t like it, does she?” he asked softly. “No, she doesn’t. But she’ll get the hang of it eventually, if you prefer.” Bill looked down at Zoe and shook his head. “Um… could you show me how to do it?” he whispered. “I don’t think I know how.” “Of course.” The nurse walked Bill through the mechanics and rocked back and forth as Zoe fed. Eventually her eyes closed again. “Bill!” He turned to see his twin, looking upset. “You... I didn’t know what’d happened to you! You didn’t tell anyone you woke up-” “Mister Kaulitz, keep your voice down. If you wake anyone up, you will personally rock them back to sleep, do you understand me?” Zoe opened her eyes and scrunched up her face and began to cry. “Don’t cry, it’s going to be okay,” Bill hummed gently as he put his nipple back in her mouth; Zoe latched on and slowly dropped off back to sleep. “I’m sorry,” Tom murmured as he came to kneel before Bill. “You’re awake,” he said, dazedly. “Tomi,” Bill whispered fondly, and touched Tom’s face gently. Tom closed his eyes and leaned into his touch. “Isn’t she beautiful?” “Yeah; looks just like you.” “She looks like both of us, idiot. She’s so small…” “How does it feel?” Tom asked curiously. “Breastfeeding?” “Weird. Sort of like a tickle and a tug. I can feel her mouth moving. Well, she stopped again.” “That means she’s done,” The nurse said softly. “Would you like me to burp her and put her down?” She stepped forward but Bill shook his head quickly. “No, I want to do it!” he said, as he moved a few hairs from Zoe’s forehead. The nurse patiently showed Bill how to burp his daughter gently, and put her back in the clear bed. He looked down at her and smiled before he stumbled a bit. “Got you,” Tom murmured. “Come on, we’re going back to let a doctor look at you.” “I just wanted to hold her,” Bill said as he leaned heavily on his twin. “I’m tired, Tomi.” “I know, come on.” *** “Why, isn’t it the man of the hour!” Gustav boomed as he walked into the room. “Gustav, shut the fuck up, Zoe’s asleep,” Bill hissed. “Sorry, gotta get used to it.” Gustav leaned over Tom’s shoulder and smiled down at Zoe. “She’s adorable, and Tom’s already wrapped around her tiny finger.” “What?” Tom looked up, surprised. “When did you guys get here?” “Proved my point.” The drummer grinned and shook his head. “Bill, how are you doing?” Bill shrugged and adjusted the covers on his legs. “I’m tired of being poked and prodded, and I just want to go home. I still find it hard to believe I was asleep for three days.” “Just glad to see you awake. And Zoe is beautiful,” Georg piped up as he sat on the edge of the hospital bed. “She has no hair!” Bill wailed as Gustav burst out laughing. “It’ll grow, Bill. Besides, what do you think those blonde wisps are?” The bassist asked with a smirk. “Fuck you; I know it’ll grow. She’ll have more hair than she can deal with,” Bill said confidently. “Correction, she’ll have more hair than you know what to deal with,” Gustav chimed in. “Come here, Gustav,” Bill said sweetly, and gestured him closer. The blond moved forward until Georg stopped him. “Dude, did you actually forget what happened the last time? I’m not helping you find whatever chunk of flesh Bill pries off of you,” he deadpanned. Gustav looked over and Bill smiled brightly, nails bared. “No thanks. I’m quite partial to the way my body is now.” “Spoilsport,” Bill pouted. “Ugh, I want to go home,” he whined. “At least there I have some cute headbands for Zoe to wear. And I wouldn’t be here still.” “When are you getting out?” Gustav asked. “Two days, no matter what the Impatient Diva says otherwise,” Tom answered before Bill could respond. “I’m fine though,” the vocalist said as he watched his twin put Zoe down. “I could leave today, if they’d let me.” “You wouldn’t want to; it’s pandemonium out there. They don’t even care that it’s starting to get cold.” Gustav shrugged. “As long as Melinda’s there we’ll be good,” Tom reminded them. Everyone looked up as someone knocked on the door. David stuck his head in and smiled. “Good, you’re awake.” “What now?” Tom asked irritably. Their manager raised his hand in peace. “Just a bit of news. I’m not even answering any calls from the label.” “So, what do you want?” “The press is clamoring for pictures of you, Bill and Zoe. They’ve arrested four photographers for sneaking onto the maternity floor, and three for either trying to scale the wall, or rappel down from the roof.” “Holy fuck,” Georg breathed. “People are crazy.” “Not to mention the fans. The police have been called in because an ambulance couldn’t get through. But that wasn’t what I came to tell you. There is a bidding war for a two shot photo shoot; in and out.” Bill looked dazed. “What’s the price at now?” “A million point five.” “A what?” Tom shouted. “Tom!” Bill hissed, and checked to see if the outburst startled Zoe. “Sorry,” Tom said sheepishly, “but you’ve got to be joking.” “No, it was at that price the last time I checked it, which was half an hour ago. So, do you want to do it?” “Just two pictures? Not a photo shoot?” Bill asked warily. “Well, they’ll do a set up and make sure that everything looks good, but they’re only allowed to take two pictures,” David promised. “Bill?” Tom looked at him expectantly. “They don’t get to touch her or hold her, do they?” “Of course not.” “Um, okay.” Bill looked down at Zoe worriedly. “Maybe they can wait until she grows some hair.” ~*~ “And that’s everything,” Melinda said happily as she turned back toward the hospital. Her smile widened as Tobi nervously straightened his tie. “Why are you wearing that thing, anyway?” she asked teasingly. “I just want to look professional, that’s all,” he said quickly. “Of course,” she murmured. “I just think that it’s adorable when big men are wrapped around an infant’s chubby hand.” Tobi’s face soured. “Is it that obvious?” “Gustav showed me a diamond bracelet he bought Zoe. It weighs as much as she does. Tom hears and sees nothing when she’s in his arms, and Bill sees everything when she’s in his.” Melinda shrugged. “You guys are going to have her spoiled before she can sit up properly.” Tobi went to object, but the side entrance swung open, and the twins came out, both holding on to a baby carrier. “I am strong enough to hold her, Tom. Let go,” Bill whined and tried not to rock their daughter, who slumbered under a black blanket. “No, we’re not fighting about this,” Tom hissed, and pried Bill’s hand off gently. “Your arms were shaking when you got out of the bed a couple of minutes ago. Now get in the car.” “What about yelling and bickering is supposed to keep your exit a secret?” Melinda snapped, and opened the warm van. “Get in.” The twins meekly scrambled into the car, and Bill made sure that Zoe was securely fastened in. “Go slow,” he said lowly, peeking under the blanket. “I will.” Melinda pulled off, and both Bill and Tom bit their lip as they drove past unsuspecting fans and press. The van was fully tinted, and the words Herman Laundry Services were silk screened on the windows. “You guys, sit back, I’ve got the heat going; we’re going to make sure no one is following us.” Tom looked over at Zoe’s car seat to glance worriedly at Bill. What happened on the way to the hospital was his worst nightmare; he didn’t want to see it happen again. *** “Finally.” Bill reached over and took Tom’s hand as they stared down at Zoe. “She looks good in her crib.” “Yeah, she does. The headband does help. But she’ll get some hair eventually,” Tom mused as he adjusted the blanket for the fortieth time. “She looks so quiet. You’d never guess she was so loud.” “They’re deceptive. I think all babies are built like that so you’ll still want to take care of them when they’re screaming their heads off.” “Just like her father,” Tom joked. “Whatever, asshole.” Bill giggled and yawned. “Go to bed, Bill. I can finish up.” Tom nuzzled his twin gently, and Bill sighed. “I’m not going to argue with you,” he said with a yawn, and Tom kissed Bill’s cheek as he left. “Good night, Zoe,” he whispered, and turned on the baby monitor that was fashioned to look like an oversized replica of Bill’s favorite mike. Tom dimmed the lights and forced himself to step out of the room and go check on Bill. “Hey, Bill, are you hu-” He smiled and shook his head. Bill was curled up on his side, fast asleep. Tom took off his caps and climbed in next to his brother. “Tomi,” Bill murmured, sighing happily. Tom nosed Bill’s neck and promptly fell into a satisfied sleep. *** Bill started and looked around the room blearily. It was difficult to see, because it was almost pitch black. Something was wrong. He stopped and listened and the baby monitor beeped once and Bill could hear soft crying. “Zoe,” he whispered, and pulled himself out of Tom’s grasp. *** Tom stretched and realized that Bill was not in his arms any longer. He looked around and frowned. Bill was singing, he could hear it on the monitor. Tom yawned and slid out of the bed, scratching his head as he walked to the nursery and opened the door. Bill was in the rocking chair, feeding Zoe as he sang with his eyes closed. Tom crept in silently and leaned against the door until Bill finished In Die Nacht. Bill opened his eyes and smiled. “Your daughter is as greedy as you are,” he teased. “Oh, you mean like you?” Tom retorted quickly, and came to stare down at Zoe. She suckled enthusiastically, with her eyes closed, little fists grabbing at air until Tom took her hand. Zoe calmed down and squeezed on the index finger in her fist. “Some grip,” he commented. “Must get it from Grandma.” “Probably.” Tom leaned over and kissed Bill on the forehead. “Did you ever think we’d get this far?” “No. I felt like I’d been pregnant my whole life. Does it feel like you thought it would?” Bill smiled up at his twin. “No. It feels… more. I feel everything I thought I would, I just feel more of it.” Tom sniffed and blanched. “What’s that smell; did you fart?” “No, Tomi. Your daughter needs to be changed. And since I fed her, I think it’s only fair.” “You caused it, so you should do it.” Tom fidgeted under Bill’s gaze. “Fine, I’ll do it,” he said heavily. “Good. And be careful. If you wake her up, you’re going in the guest room with the baby monitor.” Tom gulped.

Chapter End Notes:

Thingy. :(

Author's Chapter Notes:

You never know. Dedicated to all my readers. Happy belated birthday present, Rashida!

“So what are we going to wear today?” Bill asked as he opened the drawers and peered down thoughtfully. “Purple or green?” Zoe gurgled. “I think I’m going to have to agree. Green it is, to match your eyes.” Bill pulled out a dark green dress and opaque tights with green and black stripes on them. “Your daddy will be upset if we don’t hurry up.” “Hey. And hey, Princess Zoe,” Andreas cooed as he closed the door to the nursery behind him. “Are you ready for your first photo shoot?” “I’m just glad they waited until she had hair.” Bill fondly adjusted the nice clump of hair on the top of her crown. It looked a bit like a thicket of blonde strands, but with a bit of soft brushing it would look like… a tamed thicket of blonde strands.“I thought you were going to stay downstairs and help Tom get rid of everyone,” Bill said as he gently eased the tights on his daughter’s chubby legs. “Stop kicking, Zoe.” “She reminds me of you, always moving,” the blond said with a laugh as he was elbowed in the side. “What, she does? And man, she looks like your Grandma Lily. Don’t you, Zoe? Don’t you look like your great grandmother Lily?” Zoe gurgled again. “She’ll be talking soon,” Bill said as he nodded happily. He blew into her face gently, and she squirmed, with a large smile on her face. “Bill, she’s only two months.” “Your point?” he asked sharply. Zoe gurgled. “You tell him, baby.” Andreas laughed and shook his head. ”Bill?” Bill’s eyes widened and he pulled on Andreas’s wrist so he could look at his watch. “Shit,” he muttered, and sped up, gathering Zoe’s baby combat boots as he tried to pack the baby bag at the same time. “What time is the shoot? And I want to put her socks and shoes on,” the blond whined. “Fine, here.” Bill threw the items at his best friend and went back to packing the Louis Vuitton that he’d managed to cajole out of Tom. The bag was fit to burst when Tom came through the door, looking for his twin. “Bill, she’s not going on vacation, just packing for an hour of pictures.” He frowned and leaned over the open bag. “How many changes of clothes did you pack?” “Eight.” Bill bit his lip. “Do you think that’s enough?” “I think it is.” Tom straightened up and rolled his eyes at Andreas, who had just finished putting Zoe’s shoes on. He smiled down at his daughter and rubbed her stomach. Zoe gurgled. “Her sock is crooked,” Tom said with a frown. Andreas huffed. “I’d prefer to think that it has a gangster lean, thank you very much.” “Whatever, dude. You better fix it before Bill comes over here,” Tom said in a stage whisper. “He better, too,” Bill agreed from across the room. “Your parents are really anal about your appearance. They don’t seem to get the fact that you’re a baby. People expect babies to have miscellaneous things on their clothes. They’ll hardly see a crooked sock.” “Yeah, tell the reporters who said that I hadn’t brought Zoe out because she was malformed and I was a bad parent for not letting everyone ogle her,” Bill spat. The smile dropped off of Andreas’s face as he realized his mistake. “Shit, Bill. I’m sorry; I forgot,” he said, and stepped aside as Bill stepped up to the crib and lifted Zoe gently. “Not in front of the baby. I should feed her, so everyone out.” Bill didn’t look up from Zoe’s face as Andreas began to cross the room. The blond shot a glance at Tom, who shrugged and patted him on the shoulder. “Its cool man, he’s just a bit sensitive about it all right now. It’ll blow over.” Tom smiled. “Come on, before you go we’ll break into that huge angel food cake that Melinda made this morning.” “The one with the strawberries on it?” “Yup.” “I’ll race you.” Andreas laughed as he was pulled back by a cheating Tom. Bill rolled his eyes as he watched his twin and best friend tumble out of the nursery. “Your dad and your uncle are really weird, just so you’re prepared,” Bill said as he unbuttoned his shirt and pulled the tabs of the nursing bra. Zoe gurgled and kicked happily before she latched on and began to feed. Bill rocked them both slowly as she held onto his index finger in a tight fist, until it relaxed and the sucking slowed. After a moment Zoe was no longer feeding; her lips moved slightly but she was sound asleep, and Bill cleaned them both up and glanced at the time. Only an hour and a half before they would be late for the shoot. A knock came at the door of the nursery as Bill had maneuvered Zoe into the baby carrier, and looked up as Melinda stuck her head in. “Hey; Tom asked me to check to see if you were ready. I told him you couldn’t rush feeding a baby, but you know how much he listens to me,” she said with a smile. “Yeah, we’re ready. Could you get the baby bag?” “Of course.” Melinda came in and grabbed the bag. “Is that everything?” “If it isn’t, then I’ll just be screwed.” ”Bill!” ~*~ “Move just like- Perfect.” Bill swallowed his grimace as the bra strap dug into his shoulder and tried to resist the urge to cover Zoe’s eyes from the bright light. He was irritated, a little hungry, and no one told him that they would want him in the pictures, too. He felt fat and bloated, and while he’d lost about twenty pounds, he still had a horrifying twenty five left to go. No way had he wanted to be on film. But the way Tom was staring at him from over the shoulder of the photographer, maybe there was something good about the way he looked. Besides, it had been forever since he’d had on make up and was done up like he used to be. Funny phrase, used to be. He looked down as Zoe fussed, and her little face scrunched up and began to get red. “Oh, no, no,” Bill cooed gently, hoping to stave off a major freak out; seems that their daughter was prone to temper tantrums like both of her fathers. “Come on, Zoe, the lights aren’t that bad…” he whispered, and leaned down to kiss her forehead gently. At the touch of his lips Zoe calmed down a little, but the photographer stepped closer and took a picture, and Zoe wailed. “We’re taking a break,” Tom broke in, and stepped around the irritated photographer as Bill breathed a sigh of relief. The shoot had already gone thirty minutes over but neither he nor Tom had complained. “I’ve almost got all the shots we need,” the man said as he switched cameras. “Can’t we just-” “No,” Tom interrupted, and picked Zoe up gently. The presence of her father made her smile, a little grimace of a smile, and then she farted. “Oh yeah, that sounded wet,” he lamented, and put her against his shoulder. Zoe lifted her head and began to wail in his ear as he reached for the diaper bag in Melinda’s sympathetic hands. “Come on, I’ll wipe your butt and maybe you’ll be in a better mood.” The photographer watched helplessly as Tom went to the bathroom and closed the door, Melinda stationed right in front with a blank look on her face. “Just a few more?” he asked Bill, who was trying to adjust himself without letting every man in the room stare even more at his chest. “Two; just two more and we’re going. She’s getting sleepy and she’s not used to the lights.” Bill huffed and gave up as his top button popped. “Fuck,” he hissed, and he pulled the top closed. “Oh, give me a break,” he whined mournfully, and the photographer grinned. “No, that’s perfect,” he reassured Bill. “It makes it look risqué.” “You do know that I’m not a woman right? Man cleavage is wrong no matter what the circumstances,” Bill snapped, and wished that he’d thought to bring another top for himself. *** “I swear, for such a cute baby, your shit smells like… shit. Like, big, huge manly trucker shit,” Tom moaned, and tried to breathe through his mouth as he wiped up the soupy mess. “And why does it have to be liquid?” he asked aloud. Tom gritted his teeth at the sound of Melinda’s laughter, and realized how silly he sounded. “Stop laughing, it’s not funny!” “Do you want me to come in and do it?” she asked through the door. He did, but Bill made him promise that only he and Bill would do things for Zoe in public. And sometimes Andreas. The tabloids and reporters were nasty with their coverage of Bill’s lack of parenting skills. Never mind no one had seen Zoe in public in the two months she’d been born. Tom had found an article about exposing a newborn to the autumn weather too early, and the pneumonia that could set in. It had both he and Bill up for most of the night, and it was then they decided to become homebodies until Zoe’s second month. The photo shoot was the first venture out in public as a “family”, how fucked was that? “No,” Tom responded lowly, and finished powdering up Zoe. He coughed briefly, and made a face at the baby powder shoved up his nose. Zoe was happy again, and waved her little fists as she rocked back and forth on her back. “Where are you going?” Tom asked with a smile, and watched as his daughter tried to suck on her fist. All she managed to do was coat her hand and part of her arm in drool. Tom wrapped up the offending shitty diaper and dropped it in the trash. Instantly he could breathe better, and leaned over his daughter in amusement as she continued to rock back and forth and suck on her hand. Well, her mouth had slipped to her wrist, and apparently the skin there tasted just as good because Zoe didn’t bother to adjust herself. Tom still couldn’t believe it. A few weeks ago you couldn’t get him to go anywhere alone with Zoe that didn’t involve sitting down. Now he felt confident enough to actually carry something else while he held his daughter, and after he’d gotten the hang of the baby powder, mostly, he became a diaper master. He wasn’t quite sure if that was something to brag about yet, but watching Zoe happy afterward always made it worth it. “What am I going to do with you when you get older?” Zoe gurgled. “Right. Of course. Why didn’t I think of that?” Tom asked sardonically as he wrestled her into her tights and pulled the dress down. It didn’t look as good as when Bill dressed her, but it would do just fine. The man could go fuck himself for all he cared. He looked up as the bathroom door opened, and Bill looked positively scandalized as he held his shirt closed. “What happened to you?” “Fucking shirt broke open, and I want to go home. The damn photographer wouldn’t listen to me when I told him he could only shoot me from the neck up.” “Bill, I’ve told you, you’re not fat,” Tom said as he rolled his eyes and looked down at Zoe. “Will you tell him, because he’s not listening to me.” Zoe gurgled. ~*~ “When do you think you’ll get over it?” Stephen asked as he rocked Zoe in her carrier. The infant fought to keep her eyes open, but the measured movement knocked her out after the long feeding from Bill. “When my boobs stop hurting and being full, and I can drop the last of this fucking baby weight,” Bill grumbled. “I told him he looked fine,” Tom interjected, throwing his hands up when his twin pouted and looked away. “He looks good.” “I look like a girl,” Bill snapped. “I don’t want to look like a girl.” “What do you think will help, Bill?” the therapist asked. This was the first session that Stephen had that included both twins and little Zoe. He was glad that many of their communication problems were behind them, but with new issues and uncharted territory, there was the opportunity to slip into old bad habits or create entirely new ones. “I want you to get me a personal trainer, and I’m not leaving the house until I lose the rest of the weight.” Bill looked at Tom expectantly. “What, all of it?” he asked plaintively. “All.” “Well fuck, fine.” “Not in front of Zoe,” Bill said quickly. “You know, she doesn’t know what were saying yet. So we should get it out of our system.” Tom wiggled his eyebrows and Bill couldn’t help but roll his eyes and laugh. “I don’t want you to think that you have to barricade yourself to get your pre-baby body back,” Stephen warned. “That can lead down an unhealthy road that you can’t afford to traverse with the new life you both are responsible for.” “No, Molly comes over and she and Joel and Rhiannon keep us company. Rhiannon says that Zoe is her best friend, or will be when she can talk. I think it will be soon.” Bill nodded proudly as Tom looked away and rolled his eyes. “Bill, she’s only two months old.” “You never know!” “Well, that’s true. All babies develop according to their own schedules. Some are prone to develop early while others take their time. But whenever she does decide to talk, it’ll be a momentous occasion, trust me. Every single one of my kids made me insanely happy when they said their first word.” Stephen made a few notes and looked up with a smile. “There are no words to describe it.” Bill smiled down at Zoe near Stephen’s feet and yawned.”Sorry,” he said quickly, when it was over. “I’m still waking up in the middle of the night, and if you’re not bouncing her or playing with her while she’s awake, you’d think she’s being abused with the screams she gives off.” “Molly’s son is so quiet sometimes I touch him to make sure everything’s okay.” Tom pointed at their daughter. “That one, on the other hand, is only quiet when we’re in public, or when we have company over.” “How’s Melinda helping out?” “Wonderfully,” Bill said with another yawn. He scooted closer to Tom and rested his head on his twin’s shoulder. “She takes care of Zoe when I really need a nap, but I don’t want to rely on her too much, because then I feel like I’m not really a parent. She also gives me pointers in a way that I can actually hear it. Mom and Mara just shriek it at me like I’m supposed to understand them. Or they want to do it.” “Bill wakes up almost every hour, checking on Zoe. Then he crashes after I wake up, because he knows I’ll take care of her.” Tom smirked as Bill smiled. “Yeah, but he still wakes me up to feed her,” he pretended to complain. All three chuckled, and Bill yawned again. “I think you two have gotten over a major hurdle. Look at you, Tom; you’ve begun understanding your emotions and how they relate to your overall health. Not just physical health, but relationship health. And Bill, you’ve learned that your actions initiate effects that you might not readily see. I think you’ve become more aware of your surroundings, and how you impact them.” “I think I have.” Bill nodded as he lifted his head. “We owe you a lot.” “Yeah. We couldn’t have gotten ready for Zoe without you,” Tom chimed in. The twins looked at each other with a small smile, twining their fingers together and squeezing. “Now what?” they asked in unison. Zoe farted.

Chapter End Notes:

You have no idea how much every read and every review means to me. Thank you so much for going on this long, long, long journey with me. Words cannot express what I am feeling right now.